


Lunch Boxes and Markers

by justlook3



Series: As Time Goes By [2]
Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Library, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Siblings, F/M, Jacob and Eve are Siblings, Kid Fic, Romance, Twins, Widowed, mentions of minor character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-11
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-04-14 05:20:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 33,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4552179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justlook3/pseuds/justlook3
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Widowed museum curator Jacob Stone raises his twins and deepens his romance with children's librarian Cassandra Cillian. Sequel to "Glue Sticks and Crayons."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Moving In

Cassandra Cillian pulled into a parking lot and stopped to collect the items on the passenger seat, a bouquet of flowers and a piece of paper with directions on it.  She hadn't told her boyfriend where she was going today, she'd instead asked his sister for directions to his late wife's grave.

She took a deep breath and opened the car door, stepped out and looked down at the directions.  Tomorrow she was officially moving in with Jake and the twins.  She'd pretty much been living there since Labor Day when they'd sat the children down and talked about the move. The kids seemed more excited about it then her cat did, though in his last trip to the house, he'd discovered a window that seemed to be to his liking.  She'd had such a tough time getting him out of it, that Maggie had laughed and said that was a sign that he just needed to stay.  So Sparky moved in two weeks ahead of schedule.

Tomorrow, the last Saturday in September, would be the day they moved the last of her belongings out of the apartment she'd lived in since she'd come to Texas.  Most of her things had already gone to Jake's but there was some furniture that she was moving in,  a few assorted books and the things that were going into storage until she could decide what to do with them.  Despite the fact that she'd been basically living with Jake for a month now, tomorrow felt so final.

And that's why she was here this afternoon.  To have a conversation with Mabel Stone about this new change in her husband and children's life.

"This is a beautiful spot," Cassandra said as she sank to her knees next to the stone, placing the bouquet on the grave. "I'd chose it if I had the choice myself." 

She bit her lip. "Hi May, I'm Cassandra.  I know Jake's told you a lot about me.  And he's told me a lot about you.  I know it seems silly for me to come seek you out, given that I'm moving into your house.  .  ."

She sighed. "But that's just it.  I am.  And I know that you're comfortable with that, I've never once felt anything but acceptance and love in that house.  And I really want to thank you for that. For loving him enough to help him move on. Made it easy for him."

"It's just . . .May. . .it's so unfair.  Jake might just be the love of my life. I know it's so early and I feel like I'm getting ahead of myself sometimes . . . . But he's the man I've been searching for all my life. I love him so much and I'd like him to be the father of my children. But I know that for me to have this happiness, you had to die.  And . . . .oh May, that's not right."

"Maggie, she cried before she had to go to school because she missed you so much. And I'd give it all up if you were still with them."

Cassandra bent her head, letting the tears fall into the grass, a breeze stirred up the leaves in the tree above her and blew past her cheek.  An odd sensation as if someone or something touched her shoulder came over her and she looked up.  But there was nothing there but the breeze and a leaf that had fallen off the tree.

But she felt oddly comforted just the same.

"I know life isn't always fair," Cassandra said softly. "But Jake told me that life had given him you and me and that we're the reason he gets through it.  So I promise May, I'll take care of them for you.  I refuse to take your place, but I will love your children just like I will my own.  And I will love Jake until he goes back to you and even then I'll love him. We'll just have to figure out how to share when we get there, huh?"

Some leaves twirled in a circle on the sidewalk in front of the grave and Cassandra giggled. "Thought that was funny, huh? Yeah, me too.  He's got a big heart, May, more than enough room for both of us. And I don't mind sharing him as long as it's with you."

"Jake showed the twins a video you made before they were born, about how you would love and support them, no matter what they want from life.  I think you and I have a lot in common when it comes to our own childhoods. So I promise, I'll give your kids all the support they need in life, just like Jake will. And I'll remind him of the promise he made to you.  Don't worry, okay? You're leaving them in good hands.  I promise."

"Thanks for everything May. For being accepting, for those beautiful children, for the influence on Jake that's made him the man he is today.  And for hearing me out. I feel a lot better about things now that I've talked to you.  Goodbye May."

She rested her hand briefly on the stone and then got up and walked away.  Above her head, a bird kept pace with her until she got to her car. Then it landed on the gate, chirped once and then flew into the sky.

* * *

Jake and Cassandra were sorting boxes at her apartment while waiting for Flynn and Eve to arrive to help.  The twins had really wanted to help but Jake had put his foot down, figured they'd be more hindrance than actual help.  His mother offered to babysit, so they were off with her for the day.

"Are you sure you want all of my decorations over at your place and not in storage?" Cassandra asked, looked up from where she was labeling boxes with a marker.

"Yeah, we'll put the seasonal ones in the crawl space with the ones I have and then you can decide later what works together."

"But . . . ." Cassandra bit her lip, not sure what to say.

"Ba-"Jake broke off, he'd nearly called her 'baby' which had been his choice of endearment for May. He'd not wanted to use it with anyone else, though sometimes Cassandra's insecurity reminded him so strongly of May's that he almost slipped into it. "Honey, what is it?"

"It's just it's your house and I don't know if . . . ."

"Now, cut that out." Jake strode over to her and cupping her chin in his hand, tilting her face toward him. "You're not just coming over for a weekend. This is going to be your home. **Our** home.  Decorate it as you want it to look and will make you comfortable.  If you like my stuff better, that's fine. But only if it's your preference. There are certain things that need to stay up because they mean things to me and the kids.  But I'll let you know what those are. Everything else is fair game. And even those things can be moved to another room if we have to.  Okay?"

She nodded. "I'm sorry, I'm just . . . ."

"I know. Trust me. I do understand.  But I mean it, it's your place too now. So if you want different curtains or want to change the bedding, just let me know and we'll do that. Maybe I'll even like it better. Like how I like your dresser better than mine, so yours is going in there. And we needed the nightstand anyway."

She smiled at him. "Thank you, I needed the reminder. It is going to be our home now."

He smiled back. "I like the sound of that, our home."  Then he kissed her.

Soon afterward, Eve and Flynn arrived to help them move.

* * *

After dropping a load of items off at Cassandra's storage unit, they headed off to the house with the U-Haul.  Eve had whispered something to Jake before they'd left and he'd laughed and nodded.

They pulled into the driveway and Jake said to Cassandra, "okay we need to go in the house first, I need to make sure the dresser will fit through the door, we might need to take it in around back."

She nodded and headed up with him.  She did wonder why he didn't grab measuring tape from the garage, but she figured maybe it was inside. She was wondering why Eve and Flynn were following them. Though it had been a hot day, so maybe they all wanted a drink of water first.

The door opened and it was quite dark in the living room.  Jake flipped on the light and suddenly shouts of "Surprise!" came from the living room.

Several of the neighbors and their kids, both of Jake's parents, Ezekiel and a few of their co-workers stood in the living room.  The twins were holding a banner that they quite obviously had made themselves (though likely with their grandmother's help) that said "Welcome home Cassandra!"

"Oh, Jake," Cassandra said.

He shook his head. "This was all the kids' idea.  They got Eve and their granny in on it. I didn't find out about it until this morning."

"Oh," and Cassandra burst into tears, which caused both the kids to stare at her in dismay, dropping the banner.

"What's the matter, darlin'?" Jake asked gently.

"Nothing, nothing at all. This is just so wonderful, happy tears. Come here you two and give me a hug. This is so wonderful, no one has ever done something like this before for me."

"We have cake!" proclaimed Matt.

Their grandmother laughed from behind them. "Don't worry Cassandra, they didn't make it, your kitchen is safe."

"My kitchen,"  and she squeezed Maggie just a little tighter. "Yes, my kitchen is safe. Well, let's go eat that cake then!"

A while later, the chaos gone except for a couple of the neighborhood men who were helping Jake, Eve and Flynn move the stuff into the house, Cassandra was in the kitchen with Jake's mother.

"I want to thank you so much for this Mrs. Stone."

"Honey, please call me Jeannie, okay?  We're family now. Or close enough."

"Does that bother you? " Cassandra blushed. "That we're not married yet?"

Jeannie shook her head, "sweetie, Mary had two children before she got their father to make it legal. And that was only because the kids asked him. He ain't ever gonna leave her, he just wasn't into the paper. But anything for his little ones. As for you and our Jake, he'll ask you to marry him when the time is right."

Cassandra smiled.  "I know.   I'm not too worried about it. Jake actually surprised me, he seemed more old fashioned.  And he and May . . . ."

"Well, he and May were barely past babies when they got married.  Her mother pitched a fit that they had to be married to live together. I thought they were too young, but ah, they were so determined.  But they . . . ."

"They'd still be happily married if she was still alive, I know." Cassandra sighed and wiped at some invisible dust on the counter.

"Now, darlin', don't. Fate is fate. May got taken way too young.  And yes, Jake and May would have gone the distance, but that's not how it happened.  And you gotta stop beating yourself up about it."

"How did you know that I . . . ."

"Oh, Cassandra, it's written all over your face. You have so much guilt over it.  And Jake can reassure you until he's blue in the face but it don't do a lick of good." Jeannie shook her head. "You have a mama like Mabel's don't you? She was always so insecure too, poor thing.  My Jake is head over heels for you and my heart is so glad to see he's in good hands.  And Mabel would be too.  I'm sure she never had thoughts about that sort of thing when she was alive, you don't when you're young. But she wasn't the type to have wanted him unhappy and alone for the rest of his life. You make him happy and you make his children happy.  So enjoy this life you have.  May's a lesson for all of us. Don't dwell on what could have been or should have been. Live for today. Love him and make your life together. Alright?"

Cassandra hugged the older woman much to her surprise. "Thank you so much. I wish I had a mama like you."

"Well, now that does a heart good." Jeannie shook her head. "Best ya can do is be like May was and vow to do better by her own children. You're doing great with the twins and when you give me more grandchildren, you'll be a great mama to them too."

Cassandra blushed but nodded. She's long ago made that vow. She'd be the mother she always wanted, not the one she had.

* * *

That night, after checking that the kids were asleep, Jake firmly locked the door behind him entering the bedroom.

She smirked from the bed. "Oh, welcoming me home in proper fashion?"

"I told ya before this was our bed, but now it's our bedroom.  So I think it's only fitting.  That is if you're not too tired from everything today."

She hopped off the bed to kiss him. "Not too tired."

"Good," and he lowered her onto the bed.


	2. State Fair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jake, Cassie and the kids head to the State Fair . . . .

Cassandra and Jake were taking advantage of a teacher in-service day to take the twins to the State Fair. Cassandra had never been even though she'd lived in Texas for four years.  She also wasn't sure if the kids were more excited about the fair or about the train ride. Having grown up with public transportation, she didn't quite share their enthusiasm but enjoyed watching them.

"So what do you want to do when we get there?" Cassandra asked the twins.

"Eat," said Jake with a smirk.

She shook her head at him. "Ah the famous 'what strange things can we fry' food they have here."

"I wanna go to the petting zoo," said Maggie. "And see the horses."

"I wanna see the Farmyard and the horses too. And the cows. Daddy won a ribbon, when he was a kid, with his calf," said Matt.

"Really?" Cassandra asked.

Jake smiled. "When I was 12, I won a blue ribbon at the county fair. I didn't place at State. But Eve won several blue ribbons at the State level. And Mary won some in the craft divisions. I only got to State once though with that calf."

"Didn't exactly do 4H in New York," Cassandra chuckled.

"Well technically city kids can do 4H," Jake laughed. "They have a local club. Though these two are like me, not too crafty. Their mama won ribbons for her painting and drawings too when she was a kid."

"Wow," said Maggie, her eyes widening. "Did you meet Mama at the Fair?"

Jake chuckled, "no baby. Remember Mama grew up in a different part of Oklahoma than I did. I didn't meet her until we were in college.  And Aunt Mary was the only one who did crafts and she didn't paint.  But maybe your grandmother," and Jake made a face over the top of Maggie's head that only Cassandra caught, "kept some of ribbons for you to see."

"I'll ask," Maggie said and then changed the subject to what else she wanted to do.

"What do you want to do, Cassie?" Matt asked.

Cassandra smiled. "Well, I wanna try a corn dog. Everyone says they're really good. And the petting zoo sounds fun. And maybe the Ferris Wheel.  Oh and the butter sculpture."

* * *

Cassandra did indeed enjoy her corn dog, being pleasantly surprised by it.  Jake tried a variety of fried foods, some good, some not so good.  The kids stuck to corn dogs but they did all share a funnel cake.

They oohed and ahhed over the baby animals in the various displays.  Cassandra and the kids went through the petting zoo and had a great time, while Jake waited for them in one of the beer tents. Matt was more interested in the calves than Cassandra had expected and Jake was surprised by all of his questions.  Jake had grown up on a cattle ranch and had raised calves as a child, but his love had always been something beyond that ranch.

"I don't rightly remember son," Jake said shrugging. "When we get home, we'll ask Aunt Eve, she'll know. Barring that, Granddad would be happy to answer those questions."

Matt had beamed and then raced off after his sister who'd gotten distracted by the horses. The kids weren't very far ahead, so Jake fell in step with Cassandra, taking her hand.

"My daddy would be pleased as anything if Matt called him asking about cattle." Jake laughed. "Finally a Stone male who was interested."

Cassandra squeezed his hand and he shook his head. "I don't mean it the way it sounded. Daddy never got me but he always supported me.  He and Mama just weren't prepared for well. . . me. They tried their best, worked real hard to spend us all to college. And neither of them say anything, but I think they were more disappointed when I started getting into football and hiding my brains."

Cassandra looked at him, "why would you do that?"

"Got beat up a lot." Jake shrugged. "Country town, art was for girls and sissies. So I started getting big to fight them off. Was decent enough at football to get a scholarship, which was a load off the parents.  May, though, she saw right through me. And she's the one that encouraged me to follow my real dreams."

Cassandra smiled, "good for her.  But yeah, I bet your dad would be happy to have some bonding time with Matt.  I've only been around your dad a couple of times, but he seems really kind.  And like he missed you all and your mother."

Jake shook his head, "that man and his land. He misses mama like crazy, but he don't trust no one to run that land. Even though he did when she was sick. Oh well, someday he might."

"Oh, that horse is so beautiful," Cassandra cooed and dropped his hand to go look at the horse Maggie was looking at.

Jake smiled and enjoyed the picture Cassandra and his children presented as they looked over the horses. He took his phone out and snapped a couple of pictures.

"You have a lovely family," an older woman said to him as he put his phone back.

"That I do, thank you," he smiled back.

* * *

They'd had a busy day so far,  seen the amazing butter sculptures which had even Matt in awe. The kids had gotten their faces painted: Maggie a fairy and Matt decided to take a break from dinosaurs and go for a tiger. Cassandra had used her knowledge of math combined with Jake's good aim to win each of the kids stuffed dogs from one of the Midway games. 

They were now on the hunt for something to drink before tackling the Texas Star, the giant Ferris Wheel.

"I want root beer," Matt said.

"I wanna lemon shake up," Maggie added.

"You're gettin' water," Jake said, "you don't need sugar."

"Awww, Cassie?" The twins turned to her looking for an ally. 

She shook her head. "Your daddy is right. I think we all could use some water right now."

The twins pouted but only briefly realizing they weren't going to win this round.  Cassandra was proud of herself, she was getting better at playing the mother role.

"I saw a place near the end of the Midway that had the water for only 1 ticket," she added, pointing.

"Perfect. I swear I tell myself every year that I'm going to bring water with me, but I never do."

They'd just gotten their water and were heading to a picnic area to sit down for a spell.  Cassandra smiled as she saw a familiar figure walking ahead.  Another rare glimpse of her library's elusive cataloger.  Jenkins was walking toward them, a lemon shake up in one hand and an almost finished corn dog in the other."Well, I'll be. Hello Master Matthew, Miss Margaret, Ms. Cillian and Mr. Stone."

"Hello, Mr. Jenkins," the twins chorused.  The twosome had always gotten a kick out of his formal address of them.

"Jenkins," Stone nodded with a grin.

"I didn't think I'd see you today," Cassandra said with a smile. "It doesn't seem like your scene at all."

"Ah yes, well I do love the reaction of food to a deep fat fryer.  Look at this," he took the last bite of his corndog and swallowed. "Tube meat and maize! And . . . ." His words trailed off as he noticed a sign on a nearby stall for the deep fried carrot cake. "My word, root vegetables and cake fried to perfection. If you'll excuse me Stone family, I will be on my way."

Cassandra and Jake exchanged glances as Jenkins merrily headed to the stall. Matt and Maggie just looked confused but the adults burst into laughter.  The kids joined in, though neither one knew exactly why.

* * *

After their break, the family headed to the Texas Star.

"It's so high," Cassandra said as Maggie took her hand as they looked up.

"It was the tallest Ferris Wheel in North America until they built one in Mexico that's a little taller 2 years ago.  Still the tallest one in the US." Jake grinned. "You can see for miles from up top. You're not afraid of heights are you?"

"Not really," Cassandra looked at the gondolas, being closed cars instead of just open seats like a lot of Ferris Wheels seemed to set her mind at ease. 

Maggie said, "we've been before, nothing to be afraid of Cassie."

"Well, then if you're not afraid, I'll be brave too." She smiled down at Maggie.

They got in line and soon it was their turn to ride.  At the top, the kids were looking excitedly around.

"Oh wow, it's so beautiful up here," Cassandra breathed.

"Yes, it is," Jake agreed but he wasn't looking at the view.  Cassandra blushed when she realized and he leaned over and kissed her.

Their kiss ended by two things, the motion as the gondola made its descent and Matt's making noises of disgust.

"Ewww."

Cassandra hid her laugh when Maggie lightly swatted her brother. "It's cute!  Just like a fairy tale."

"Whatever," sighed Matt as he went to look out again.

"Hey, maybe you and Daddy could get married on the Ferris Wheel!" Maggie exclaimed.

"Umm . . . ." Jake looked a little lost for words.

But Cassandra laughed, "oh honey, I think I'd rather do something more Princessy when that happens, don't you think?"

Maggie nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, you're right."

"Okay," said Jake, changing the subject. "I've only got a few tickets left, so one more treat.  What does everyone want?  We'll stop by the DAR House on the way out and buy some more water."

"Ice cream!" said Maggie and Matt nodded.

"Ice cream sounds wonderful actually." Cassandra added.

"Ice cream it is."

* * *

They were a few stops away from home on the train.  Two sleepy but happy children were nodding off on Jake and Cassandra's laps.

"Did you have a good time?" Jake asked.

"I did," Cassandra said. "Really had fun.  And," she blushed. "I really felt like a mother today."

"I know," Jake laughed. "Some lady told me the kids looked just like you, which is kinda funny."

"They look like you," Cassandra chuckled. "I mean I guess like with May, our kids would have blue eyes too.  Wow, I do tend to get ahead of myself with you."

He reached the  hand that wasn't bracing a sleeping Maggie on his lap over and brushed her cheek. "It's not as if I don't have those thoughts too, you know. We'll have one or two eventually, okay?"

"I know," she smiled softly.

"So, would you want something Princessy for your wedding? I mean cuz the Ferris Wheel. . . ." He winked at her.

"Jake!" She mock hissed. "I actually always kinda . . . ." She bit her lip. "Actually I did always dream of a Princess wedding.  David and my mother had other plans."

"We're not quite ready yet, but you know who I am. Your dreams are yours and just like with my children's, I won't squash them. I mean as long as we can afford them."

"When we're ready, we'll talk about it."  She brushed  a kiss across his cheek but that woke Matt up.

It was just as well, as they were almost to their stop.

As Cassandra went to sleep that night, she thought about what a great day it had been.   And how happy she was in her life.  Then that little voice in her head, the one that always sounded a bit like her mother, asked her when she thought the other shoe would drop.  She silenced the voice eventually but to do so she had to hold Jake tighter than she normally needed to to fall asleep.


	3. Costumes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's almost Halloween, which means it's time to pick out everyone's costumes . . . .

About a week later, they were all sitting in the den on a Friday evening.  The twins were playing a board game on the floor, Jake was reading and Cassandra was finally tending to the mending she'd let pile up for quite some time.  She'd run out of cardigans only to realize the majority of them were waiting on buttons.  Since she'd already had sewing to do, she'd asked around the house and had two pairs of Matt's pants and a jacket of Jake's as well.

She was making good time on the buttons, having done the boys' things first and was now halfway through her sweaters. The sewing reminded her of something and she leaned forward.

"Guys?"

"Yes, honey?" Jake hadn't even looked up from the journal he was reading and Cassandra rolled her eyes.  She totally felt like a wife in this moment.

"What is it, Cassie?" Maggie asked from the floor. Cassandra knew she could count on her.

"Well, I was thinking, Halloween is coming up and I wasn't sure what we were doing."

"Aunt Eve and Uncle Flynn have a party," Matt said. "It's super fun."

Jake marked his place in the journal. "Actually I'm surprised we didn't meet there last year, did you go? I remember Jenkins being there. And now that I know who he is, I'm pretty sure Ezekiel went."

Cassandra sighed. "I was invited. I had a costume all made and everything. And then I got a horrible headache. And it took forever to go away. I'm making every effort to avoid that this year."

"Aww, that sucks Cassie." Matt said.

"What did I say about that word?" Jake sighed. Not that it did much good.  It didn't help that he occasionally used it. It was just like his lazy grammar, he kept hoping the kids wouldn't pick it up, but they did.

"So anyway," Cassandra finished her button and put the cardigan aside. "I have stuff at the library on the Friday . . . ."

"The after school party!" Maggie exclaimed.

"Yes and before you guys, I have the little ones in the morning. I have a really cute Halloween dress I plan on wearing for that. But for Flynn and Eve's party, I was thinking we should all dress up.  Maybe a theme?"

The twins, Cassandra noticed, looked excited about the idea.  Jake, on the other hand, didn't really. She knew he'd eventually get talked into it, so she didn't worry too much.

The kids then started talking over each other. "You can't be a dinosaur, we can't all be dinosaurs! That's not what a theme is!"

"Well, I wanna be something cool!"

"I wanna be a princess or a fairy!"

"Well, you be that and I'll be a dinosaur."

It went on for a few minutes back and forth. Cassandra trying theme ideas on the kids. Superheroes and dinosaurs had been shot down.  

"Frozen?" Cassandra ventured.

"Oooh," said Maggie.

"She was Elsa last year," Matt scoffed.

"And everyone's probably still doing it," Cassandra sighed. "Okay, any other ideas?"

"I told you, she can be a princess and I can be a dinosaur," Matt muttered, "don't know why the stupid theme."

"It's not stupid!" Maggie yelled.

That's when Jake stepped in.  He noticed Cassandra's downcast face and realized that this meant a lot to an only child who finally had a family after years of longing for one.

"Matt and Maggie, stop it right now.  This whole theme thing means a lot to Cassandra, so we're gonna think of something that we can all be. Okay?"

"Even you?" Cassandra's voice was hopeful and he couldn't help smiling at her.

"Even me."

May had been into the whole theme idea too.  Their first Halloween, the twins had been just babies and she'd dressed them up as Dalmatians and the two of them had dressed as the couple from that movie. The next year, the kids were a year and a half and she'd picked cowgirls and cowboys.  Jake made a mental note to discourage that theme. As fetching as Cassandra would look as a cowgirl, it was important that the memory of this first Halloween be unique to her.  Maybe next year or the year after, they could use that theme.

"What about the Wizard of Oz?" Cassandra asked. "I could be Dorothy and Maggie could be Glinda and you boys could decide what you want to be."

Jake tilted his head. "It's not bad.  Wait, let me get some paper and we'll write this stuff down."  He went over to his desk and handed a pad of paper and a pen to his girlfriend.

"Okay, so Wizard of Oz but probably not Frozen since Maggie did that last year."

"Peter Pan!" Maggie exclaimed. "I wanna be Tinker Bell.  Daddy could be Captain Hook and Cassie Wendy."

"Yeah, but I wanna be a pirate!" Matt said, "that would be so cool! Let's do that."

"I'm not bein' Peter Pan." Jake said. "Nope, no way. Sorry, darlin' but I ain't wearing tights."

Cassandra chuckled. "I doubt they make them in your size anyway.  Maybe just green pants? You have  a pair of greenish cargo pants."

He sighed. "Alright, add it to the list."

Alice in Wonderland was suggested, but no one was really too keen on it. A couple of others came up but they couldn't figure out four costumes that would work.

"What about Star Wars?" Jake asked. "There are tons of characters we could work with there. Something for everyone."

The twins looked excited and started talking about who they could be.  But Jake noticed that Cassandra looked a little uncomfortable even though she smiled and joined into the conversation for a bit. Then she got up, saying she needed a drink.  He left the kids still discussing what Matt should be and followed her into the kitchen.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?"

"It's . . .you'll think it's silly."

"I know you only recently saw the movies and it's kinda more our thing but . . . ." And then Jake realized what had made Cassandra upset. "It's because Star Wars was May's thing."

She nodded. "I'm sorry, I'm being selfish and stupid.  And I know how much you all love those movies and everything else. If you want to go with that theme, I'll go along."

"No, we won't." He walked over to her and pulled her into a hug. "This is your first Halloween with us. And remember, we talked about making our own memories?  So this Halloween is about you and finding something that's unique to you and to us as a family. Okay?  That's why I was prepared to shoot down suggestions of cowboys."

"Oh, that was a theme May picked?"

"Yeah, for the kids' second Halloween. The first one was 101 Dalmatians. Remind me to show you those photos, they were tiny and so adorable. "

"I'd love to see you in cowboy garb," Cassandra smirked, feeling much better now.

"And you'd look so fine as a cowgirl, but not this Halloween. Another one."

"Thank you, Jake." Cassandra reached up and kissed him.  "I have an idea."

"Yeah?"

"Well, Maggie wants to be a princess and we already have this whole fairy tale thing going on with the two of us anyway, thanks, well to Maggie. Why don't Maggie and I go as Princesses and you and Matt can be our Knights?"

"That's way better than Peter Pan." Jake chuckled.

"Knights wore tights."

"Not all of them and we can totally work around that. Besides, I object to that never growin' up thing. There are certain things, Princess, that I enjoy about being an adult."

Cassandra grinned impishly, "oh and what would those things be, my Prince?"

The smile he gave her in return was sexy, "I think you know."  Then his lips met hers in a slow, sensual kiss. Alas, things were just getting interesting when Maggie came into the kitchen.

"You're takin' forever," she said, "are you comin' back?"

"Yes," Jake said, parting from Cassandra with a sigh. "And we have a great idea."

They came back into the den and Cassandra said, "so I was thinking instead of trying to do a movie or a book,  Maggie and I can be princesses and you boys can be knights or princes, it's up to you."

Maggie's eyes went wide, "can my dress be pink?"

"Of course."

"Can I have a sword?" asked Matt.

"A plastic or cardboard one, but yes," confirmed his father.

"So we're good, that's what we're gonna go with?" Cassandra asked.  "We could go to the Halloween store tomorrow and go looking at ideas.  We might have to make something but I'm pretty good with a needle and Lacey at work will let me borrow her sewing machine."

The twins nodded excitedly.  They talked over a few ideas for a little while but then the twins wanted to finish their game.  Jake wanted to finish his article and Cassandra had to finish her sewing.  So they decided to wait until they got to the store to make final choices.  And went back to what they were doing.

* * *

Sometime later, after the kids went to bed, Cassandra stretched and looked over at Jake. "I think I'm going up to bed, join me?"

He smirked, looking at the clock and knowing that sleeping wasn't exactly what Cassandra had in mind. "I'm gonna lock up and make sure the kids are asleep, then I'll be up."

"Not too long," she kissed him, keeping the kiss slow and sexy like in the kitchen earlier. He had to chuckle at the swing she put in her hips going up the stairs.

A little while later, he was locking the bedroom door behind him.  Cassandra was sitting on the edge of the bed wearing the mint green lingerie she'd surprised him with not that long ago.

"Hmm, to what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Well, Sir Knight," Cassandra said, throwing her arms around his neck. "I believe you told me that there were things you really liked about being an adult.  So I thought that I'd show you a few of those things."

"Mmm," he picked her up. "I believe my Lady Princess that I could show you a thing or two as well."

"Looking forward to it," she said as he carried her over to the bed.

He laid her down and hushed up her giggles with kisses.  And then they each showed the other why being an adult was a very good thing indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, the fried carrot cake from last chapter won "Best Taste" in the Fried Foods contest ahead of the State Fair of Texas. Jenkins knows what he's about!


	4. Halloween

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, I'm back and hopefully won't leave you hanging so long again!  
> Thank you to Imagination_Parade, Struckk and PyreWrites for the suggestions and comments while I was writing this chapter, I really appreciated the help!

The day before Halloween, Cassandra was scurrying around the library, it being rather busy for a Friday. Because she was going to be active all day instead of the princess costume she'd be wearing the next day, she'd opted for a Halloween print dress. It had a fun and spooky cat theme to it. It was sleeveless so she wore it over a black short sleeved turtleneck and paired it with some fun cat tights and a pair of shoes that looked like cats.  She was, however, starting to think that she would need to put her converse on before the afternoon crowd.

She'd just finished cleaning up from the preschoolers when Ezekiel appeared, his arms full of decorations. He too was having an afterschool event for his crowd and he'd promised to help her change up the decor for the slightly older kids.

"Now remember, this is elementary," she warned him. "I know you've gone all blood and gore over in the Teen Section."

Ezekiel rolled his eyes. "I know, I know. Geez. Age appropriate scary."

They giggled and joked as they hung up pumpkins and ghosts and strung cobwebs everywhere.  Ezekiel said he could just hear Jenkins now complaining about the mess.

"Though it's not his library, it's mine." Flynn winked as he strode up and offered to hang up a skeleton that neither Ezekiel nor Cassandra could quite get in the place they wanted. "Very age appropriately festive Cassandra. Though Jones, maybe we need to tone down some of the blood over in teens?"

Ezekiel shrugged, "you know how teenagers are boss.  They're all into cheesy horror at that age, except," and he shuddered. "Those girls who try as I might are into sparkly vampires."

Cassandra giggled. "Now, now Ezekiel, we're not supposed to judge as long as a child is reading."

"You probably like those books," he muttered. "But yeah, yeah, yeah. I try to get them to upgrade though."

Flynn just shook his head. "As long as you don't mock their reading choices to their faces, I don't mind you trying to influence them into reading something else. After all, it's all about getting these kids to read and you do a mighty fine job of it."

Ezekiel beamed and then Flynn continued, "despite all of our misgivings about you in the first place."

"Hey!" Ezekiel exclaimed as Cassandra laughed harder.

"Now then, carry on," Flynn winked at the red head and then went off toward his office.

"So your steps coming to this shindig?" Ezekiel asked changing the subject.

"My what?"

"Your stepkids?"

"They're not my stepchildren, Ezekiel. Not yet anyway."

"Eh," he shrugged. "Close enough."

"But yeah, they're coming. Jake is taking a break in the afternoon to go get them after school then I'll take them home with me. Maggie is a bit disappointed that meant she didn't get to wear her costume to this, but it's too heavy for school and Jake doesn't have time to get them changed."

Ezekiel stared at her, then blinked slowly. "So that's what it's like? And you and Jake want more of them?"

She grinned at him. "It sounds hectic and chaotic and at first I was so overwhelmed. And lord knows, Jake . . .he had it so tough for so long.  But I love it and I love them." Her smile was soft. "And for the first time in my life, I'm where I belong. So as crazy as it gets, I'm there for it."

Ezekiel wanted to make a comment but he stopped at the look on his friend's face. He didn't take things very seriously, he was in a totally different place in his life than the woman next to him. But he also wasn't the type to knock genuine happiness. And he had to admit in the two years he'd known her, he'd never seen her this happy and content. So he just smirked at her and asked her where she wanted the plastic spiders.

The afternoon party was more of a drop in thing with various events scheduled throughout the afternoon. Ongoing was the coloring contest and in lieu of pumpkin decorating, Cassandra had ordered pumpkin shaped cookies from a local bakery and the kids could decorate them with icing and candy.  Cassandra also had a few Halloween themed games going on. Hocus Pocus was showing in one corner and Flynn had a schedule of ghost stories to tell. Then it was all going to wrap up with a dance party for the last hour.

Jake hadn't really time to stop for more than a quick passing kiss for Cassandra as he handed off the twins. He had a project at work he really wanted to wrap for the weekend so he needed to get back to work.

Although the twins didn't wear their costumes to school, they'd both worn Halloween tops, Maggie's featuring a witch and a black cat and Matt's a skeleton.  They had a great time doing all the activities, coloring, decorating, bobbing for apples, shivering along with Uncle Flynn's stories and then finally bopping along to Halloween party hits at the final dance party.

It was nearly seven when Cassandra finally pulled up at home, the twins having been actually good helpers with the clean up.  She'd called Jake about just taking the kids out for dinner but he'd said he'd gotten his work finished and he'd have dinner for them when they got home.

Cassandra and the twins stumbled into the house to be greeted by the smells of Jake's homemade pizza. To Cassandra, who'd been so busy she'd barely had time to eat, it smelled just like heaven. Jake could tell she was well on her way to toppling over, so told her to go sit down and relax while he got the kids cleaned up. She stopped to wash her hands but then did as he suggested.

After dinner, Jake sent the kids to the living room, told them to pick out a game for the three of them. "Cassie's had a long day, so I think we'll just keep out of her hair for a bit."

"Thank you," she said when they'd left the room. "I'm so tired. Long day."

"Headache?"

"No, thank goodness. And I'm surprised. But I've just . . . I barely had lunch and I've barely sat down all day."

"Well, the maid came today and I asked her to make sure the bathtub was scrubbed, so why don't you go take a bath and just relax? I'll keep the kids occupied."

"You had a busy day too."

Jake grinned at her, "but mine was all research work and typing. I wasn't wrangling little ones all day long. I'm fine.  Been lookin' forward to some time with my kids tonight anyway. Now go, take care of you before you do get a headache."

"You're the best, Jacob Stone."

He smiled at her and leaned over to kiss her. "Nothing more than you deserve, sweetheart."

And as he left, he didn't notice the brief wave of pain that crossed her face. Or if he did, he chalked it up to exhaustion.

* * *

It was Halloween afternoon and the family was getting ready to go the Carsens' Halloween party.  Even though Jake had been a little reluctant about the whole Halloween costume idea, he'd had to admit that he and Matt had had a lot of fun picking out fake swords in the store.  When the kids were a little older, he made a note to take them to the Renaissance faire so they could at least look at (but certainly not touch until they were teenagers) real swords.

The girls were still getting ready, so Jake and Matt were having a sword fight in the backyard. They'd picked costumes that were similar, both sporting red tunics with fake chain mail.  Matt's had a hood and had come with pants and silver shin guards. He wore his black tennis shoes which were mostly disguised by the guards.  Jake's hadn't come with pants, but he'd ended up going with just plain black sweat pants and his normal black boots. The boot covers did a decent enough job disguising them as something a knight might wear.

Matt had bested his father in the sword fight (well Jake had mostly let him win) when Maggie tapped against the glass sliding door.  She was the very vision of a little princess. She was wearing a white ball gown trimmed with gold with a pink plaid overcoat.  On her curly head she wore one of her Disney Princess tiaras.  She wore pink ballet slippers to complete the look.

"You look real beautiful, Princess Margaret," Jake said, bowing to her as the boys came inside.

Maggie giggled.

"Where's Cassandra?" Jake asked looking around.

"I'm coming," Cassandra called from the top of the stairs as she made her way down them.

Jacob had to suck in a breath.  She looked stunning, way more beautiful than he'd expected when he saw the costume in the store.  He'd been taking care of Matt and hadn't seen her try it on, but he'd seen her buy it.  The green and gold dress hugged her figure in ways that her usual attire didn't and it suited her to a tee.  She wore her hair much more curly than usual, letting it fall in ringlets, she'd opted to replace the headpiece that had come with the outfit with a gold tiara.  She wore gold flats under the dress and a gold necklace from her own collection.

"Wow, she looks like she came out of a book!" Matt said from beside him.

That broke Jake out of his spell and he bowed to her like he had to his daughter. "You look just like a painting, my lady."

She smiled, playing along. "Thank you, Sir Knight." She held out her hand and Jake kissed her knuckles, winking at her while he did so.

Then she giggled, "we all look awesome if I do say so myself.  Are we ready to go?"

Both of the twins nodded and Jake made sure that the backdoor was locked and that Matt had his sword. Cassandra cautioned Maggie on her skirt and they were off.  They took Cassandra's car instead of the truck as Cassandra was concerned about her and Maggie hopping in and out of the truck in their long skirts.

The Carsens' place had been completely transformed for the party. Out on the front lawn, a ghostly cemetery rose from the grass, a fog machine at the ready for nightfall.  A giant lightup spider sat on their balcony and a several pumpkins and luminaries lined the sides of the sidewalk leading up to the front door.

Flynn opened the door wearing a robe and pajamas.  Jake cocked his head to the side and looked quizzically at his brother-in-law.

"Did we come early?" he asked as Cassandra beamed next to him and clapped her hands.

"Great Arthur Dent costume boss!"

"Who?" Jake asked, still confused.

Both Cassandra and Flynn looked at each other and back at him. "Seriously?" Cassandra asked, just a bit shocked at her boyfriend's confusion.

"Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy?" Flynn said, "I thought you liked science fiction. Or is it just Star Wars? May would have . . . ." Flynn stopped himself abruptly, looking guilty.

"I remember she had that book," Jake said softly. "But you know me, I never get around to reading fiction, always something better in a history book.  Only got into Star Wars because of her."

"It's okay, Flynn," Cassandra said quietly. "It doesn't bother me to talk about her at all.  And I'm actually happy to know she would have gotten the reference too.  I love those books." And she smiled warmly.

Eve appeared behind her husband, "is my husband sticking his foot in his mouth again?"

"I was . . ." Flynn gestured sheepishly.

"It's okay, Evie," Jake said. "So I'm gonna guess you're not wearin' a costume? Or is this obscure too?"

Eve was wearing head to toe black. The only thing that hinted at the festive occasion were rather elegant silver spiderwebs dangling from her ears and a silver spider necklace.

"Nope, no costume.  Just Halloween. And by the way, you all look really cool.  Especially you girls."

"Thank you," Cassandra said. "Though it is a bit hot in these. How did they cope back then?"

"They didn't live in Texas," Jake winked. "Medieval Europe was much colder then here, especially during the  . . . ."  They were all looking at him like he'd been earlier looking at Flynn and he cleared his throat. "Um, so what all's goin' on?"

Eve and Flynn had two levels of a haunted house going on. In the basement there was a much more traditionalish Haunted House going on for the teens and older crowd.  In the rec room, there was a kid friendly Haunted House of the "put your hand in a box and feel peeled grapes" variety for the youngsters of the neighborhood.  In the backyard, they had a dance going on complete with DJ.  There was food and candy for the kids to take home.  Various games for the kids were also going on and the twins headed off to check out all of the kids activities.

Along with the dancing, the adults at the party were clustered around talking or playing pool.  There were a few people sitting out by the pool too, just relaxing in a little bit more of a quiet place.

Cassandra was wandering over to the punchbowl later in the evening and burst out laughing when she spotted her friend Ezekiel who had been spending much of the evening downstairs helping with the fright fest.  He was wearing a bow tie and a tweed jacket.

"Oh my God, you're Jenkins!"

"I know, isn't it awesome?"

"He's going to kill you," Cassandra chuckled. "Is he here?"

"I haven't seen him, but knowing Jenkins, he's probably eating a caramel apple and going on about edible crystals."

Cassandra nodded and laughed as Ezekiel walked off.  Jake came up behind her, resting one hand on her waist.

"Are you doing okay? Not too much noise?"

"I'm doing great.  Are you okay? You've been kinda quiet since Flynn brought up May."

"I'm sorry," Jake pressed a kiss against the back of her neck. "I sometimes think too much.  I really am having a good time."

Cassandra turned to face him. "And?"

"And I'm here with you, not with May. I promise. I just, sometimes these parties just . . .it's not really my scene. "

"I was going to ask if you wanted to dance, but how about a walk down by the lake?"

He grinned at her and took her hand.  A few minutes later, they were walking hand in hand far enough away from the house that they were in their own world.  Jake took the opportunity to indulge in a little flight of fantasy. In that moment, they weren't at a Halloween party in 21st century suburban Dallas but a knight and his lady taking a stroll along the shores of some Medieval lake.

"Where are you?" Cassandra asked gently some time later.

"12th Century England," Jake grinned at her. "Just a knight out courting his lady under cover of darkness."

"Sounds a bit scandalous," Cassandra grinned back.

"Perhaps, as you'd be a high born noblewoman who shouldn't be out without her ladies. But in all times, rules were meant to be broken."

She put her arms around his neck and he pulled her in for a kiss. "Thank you," he said as they parted.

"For what?"

"For handling Flynn's mention of May like you did, for indulging me in my need to get out of that party for a while. For understanding when I go on my little mind journeys.  I don't know how I got so lucky to find you . . . but just thank you."

"I love you, Jacob, what I do is no more than what you deserve."

"I love you too, Cassandra."

There were tears in Cassandra's eyes as they embraced in the moonlight. He pulled back, his eyes questioning.

"They're happy tears. I'm so . . .I never really belonged anywhere. Not until you and the twins.  And you've gone out of your way to not just share your family with me . . . ."

"Our family," he said gently. "You're part of the family now. And these are our memories. Tonight and going forward. I meant it, I'm here with you tonight, no one else."

She sniffled a little and he wiped the tears from her face before leaning down and kissing her.  There by the lake, just a knight and his lady.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cassandra's outfit for the library: http://www.polyvore.com/cassandra_halloween_at_library/set?id=179006194  
> Their Halloween costumes: http://www.polyvore.com/stone_family_halloween_costumes/collection?id=4744672


	5. Thanksgiving

"Seriously?" Jake looked up from the counter where he was rolling out pie crusts. "You've never had a home cooked Thanksgiving dinner?"

"Nope," Cassandra said, trying to stay out of the way while eying the apples he had on the counter to use in his pie filling. "Mother didn't cook and Dad always gave our cook the holidays off. Plus she liked to be somewhere warm around Thanksgiving." She shrugged, totally missing the frown that momentarily crossed Jake's face which he hid by looking down at his work. "So usually Thanksgiving was at a restaurant or more likely the tourist buffet at some resort in Mexico or on a cruise ship."

"And after you moved here?"

"I didn't really do anything. Usually just something in front of the tv.  Last year Ezekiel made me come out with his friends to a restaurant.  So I'm really looking forward to Thanksgiving at the ranch. And finally getting to go to the ranch, actually." She smiled at him and he returned it.

"I know, I asked you months ago to go up there.  But that's life, I suppose. Besides the summer is crazy on the ranch, so it was just as well that we weren't up getting in the way."

"And your other sister is coming too?"

"Yep and her husband and all her kids."

"Wow, is there gonna be enough room for all of us?"

"Well, it might be kinda tight, but Mama was telling me that the ranch hand who had the double wide got married and moved into town so it's currently empty, so she'll probably put Mary and her family in there. There's four bedrooms up in the house, so it'll be fine for the rest of us."

"We gonna be in your old room?" Cassandra asked with a wink, edging in closer to take a look at what he was doing. He kissed her cheek but steered her away from his precious pies.

"Probably, but don't get too excited, Mama redecorated those rooms long ago.  Doesn't look a thing like it did when I was growing up. Well, I suppose it's still blue, but otherwise . . . ."

"Aww, darn. Thought it would be fun to take a glimpse into your childhood."

"Sure you'll see plenty if Mama has her way."

* * *

 

The afternoon before Thanksgiving, Jake, Cassandra and the twins were on their way to the ranch in Oklahoma. Jake had to say that he'd been amused by Cassandra's reactions.  As they broke away from the Metroplex, her eyes got wider and they were almost saucers as he turned off onto the gravel road that lead from the highway to his family's ranch.

"Never seen country before?" he teased. "It's not like we don't have long horns milling around next to strip malls in Dallas, honey."

"We do, but it's not like this! I've never even been on a gravel road before!"

"Really?" Matt asked, confused from the back seat.

"Really," she answered. "I grew up in New York City, it's like Dallas only on a massive scale. We didn't even own a car when I was a kid."

The twins looked like they had a lot of questions about that and Cassandra headed them off. "The traffic is really bad there, so no one wants to drive.  We walked or took trains or the subway or if necessary taxis. My grandfather lived in the suburbs and he taught me to drive.  When I came to Texas,  I moved into that apartment where I lived before you guys and I haven't really been out in the country.  The suburban cattle are as close to country as I get."

"Well, you're gonna get your fill of country here," and Cassandra didn't miss Jake's sigh. As excited about the ranch as his kids were, Cassandra knew that a young Jake had often felt trapped here.  She did wonder sometimes why he and Mabel hadn't gone further from home, both of their artistic aspirations should have taken them to New York or even Europe.  But then she saw the collection of vehicles coming up ahead in front of the sprawling ranch house. And she knew the answer,  Dallas was as far from his family that Jake could bear to go.  Trapped or not, this was his home and he couldn't leave it too far in his rear view.  She wondered if some day the twins would feel the same way about Jake's house.

Jake found a spot to park his truck and he'd barely got it into park when the twins were jumping out and running to their grandfather who'd come out of the house. Following behind him was a brunette woman with blue eyes, who looked a great deal like her younger brother. Jake had explained once that Eve took after his mom's side of the family, his mother's brothers having been tall while he and Mary took after the Stones.   It had been comical growing up, especially after Eve took to dying her hair blonde.  But aside from her height, Eve looked a great deal like her father, while Mary and Jake took after their mother mostly in looks.

Jake helped Cassandra down from the truck and then introduced her to his sister.

"Eve's told me so much about you Cassandra," Mary was saying. "And I couldn't wait to meet the woman who put the smile back on my baby brother's face."

Cassandra blushed and Jake shook his head. "C'mon, Mare . . ." he good-naturedly growled. "You're embarrassin' her."

"Yeah, yeah. The real question is, did you bring pie?" Mary asked addressing her brother.

"Did I bring pie?  What do you take me for? I know all ya'll only drive six hours for one of my pies."

Cassandra chuckled at the back and forth between the siblings as Jake took the cooler out of the truck where six pies were safely packed, ready to be reheated for tomorrow. At first Cassandra thought that was a bit much, but then she remembered that there were at least eight adults and six children at this dinner and now she was wondering if that was enough.

Cassandra was soon taken inside to the whirlwind of Stones and their husbands and children. She was introduced to Mary's husband Dale and their four children: Joshua, Tyler, Rachel and Kayla.  Eve and Flynn had pulled up not long after Jake had and it was nearly dinner time.  Jeannie had decided on a pasta bar, figuring it was simple and something everyone would like after a long day of traveling.

Later in the evening, Cassandra slipped away for just a few minutes of quiet.  It was a clear night and she marveled at all of the stars she could see.  Maybe sometime this weekend she could talk Jake into doing some stargazing with her. Maybe bundle the twins up with some hot chocolate and take the truck out even further from the house. She had an app on her phone with some simple things for the kids to find.

She was startled from her thoughts by movement to her right, she thought at first it was Max, the family dog, but she realized it was Flynn.

"Hey boss," she greeted. "Needed some air too?"

"Don't need to call me boss here," Flynn chuckled. "We're practically family now."

"I know, it's a habit, you've been my boss longer." Cassandra took a deep breath. "It's peaceful out here, but maybe not so much inside. It's strange, Jake usually starts getting a little antsy with crowds, but tonight . . . ."

"They're his people," Flynn said. "And that makes a difference."  Flynn moved a little closer, bit his lip. "A little advice?"

"I didn't know I needed it, but sure." Cassandra chuckled.

"I know you don't talk about your home or your family much, but . . . I don't have a lot of kin either. My dad died when I was a baby, it was just me and my mom. And then she died not long after I graduated from college.  I had a few friends and one of them was May."

"Yeah . . . ."Cassandra wasn't sure where this was going.

"May never talked about her birth family much, her dad every now and again. But she always talked about her in-laws. And I mean, I never met anyone who loved her in-laws the way May did." Flynn chuckled. "Until they became my in-laws and I understood. These people, Cassandra, they take you in.  And they become your family.  And yeah, they're overwhelming and they're loud and maybe they're not quite us.  But they will love you through thick and thin and beyond that." Flynn sighed. "Jake brought that girl he was dating here once, Hope I think her name was.  She was a lovely girl but the family didn't take to her.  Not like they've taken to you. So take that anyway you'd like."

Cassandra smiled. "And your advice?"

"Embrace it, let these people be your family.  You're not going to find better people than the Stones."

She smiled and patted his shoulder. "Thank you, Flynn."

Then she turned and headed back into the house.

* * *

 

On Thanksgiving Day, Cassandra made a point to heed Flynn's advice and embrace this new family of hers. She joined Mary, Jeannie and Jake in the kitchen to make dinner.  Since Jake did have a habit of wandering out to check on the football games, Mary had laughed that it was a good thing they had an extra set of hands or nothing would get done. Eve joined her father and Dale in the living room to watch the various games.  And Flynn kept the children occupied, when he wasn't running into the kitchen trying to get a taste of whatever was currently being cooked.

Dinner started with a prayer and then continued with much laughter and talking.  All kinds of stories about life growing up on that ranch, joined with stories from their current lives in Dallas and Austin. Cassandra ate way too much but she enjoyed herself thoroughly. And besides, wasn't that what a holiday was for?

Bill, Jake's father, then proclaimed that those who cooked didn't have to clean up. That got some good natured whining from Eve and Dale, but they joined him in the kitchen with Joshua and Kayla. Flynn took the garbage out , then went back to entertaining the littler children, especially three year old Rachel who was quite taken with this fun uncle.

Cassandra and Jake snuggled in on the couch to watch the late football game, though Cassandra was more about the cuddle then the sporting event.

Later that night, they were settled in to what had once been Jake's room. As Jake had explained, it bore little trace that it had once been a boy's bedroom.  It had resemblances to their room back in Dallas, Jake had always preferred a tranquil blue for his room. But it really was more generic guest bedroom than the peaceful Impressionists scheme that they had at home. Cassandra figured that young Jake probably had been more football and comic book orientated than the grown up version, however.  The twins and Mary's two oldest were in Mary's old room, which was now fitted out with two bunk beds and a more child friendly primary color scheme. The younger two were housed in the double wide with their parents. Flynn and Eve were in Eve's old room, which much like Jake's had been converted into a guest room.

She'd gotten ready first and was now staring out the window when Jake's arms went around her.

"You okay?" He asked, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I forgot how loud we can be."

"I got some fresh air a few times. I have a little headache but it's really nothing compared to my normal ones.  Sleep will help." She smiled. "It really is beautiful here, I was thinking maybe we could take the kids out to look at the stars before we leave."

"That sounds like a plan."  She turned in his arms and he kissed her before continuing. "So how was your first family Thanksgiving?"

"It was everything I dreamed about and more." Cassandra said with a dreamy smile. "Thank you for including me."

"It wouldn't have been Thanksgiving without ya, Cassie. You're what I'm thankful for this year."

She beamed at him. "Me too, Jake, me too."


	6. Star Gazing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a little short, but I'm moving the plot along and the next couple of chapters might be on the long side.

The kids were excited as their father drove them and Cassandra out to an isolated stretch of the ranch.  It was a little past their bedtimes but Cassandra had explained they had a better chance of seeing more stars that way.  They were dressed warmly and there were some blankets ready to go.  Their grandmother had sent them off with cookies and a thermos of hot chocolate.  Jake had attempted to argue with the idea of giving them sugar so late, but he always had a hard time arguing with his mother's experience.  So here they were.

Soon they were pulling over and Cassandra showed the twins her stargazing app, explaining what they were looking for as Jake arranged the blankets and pillows in the bed of his truck.  A few minutes later, they were all comfortably snuggled in the back, looking up at the heavens.

Well, the children and Cassandra were looking up at the sky.  Jake was watching them.  Awestruck for several moments, the children just looked up, mouths open at the vast amounts of stars in the cloudless sky.  Cassandra was just as struck, silent, the cool air causing a flush across her cheeks.

"Wow," she finally breathed. "This is magnificent.  I envy you having a view like this growing up."

This time, Jake did take the opportunity to crane his neck up and just look.  He'd taken these skies for granted growing up. They didn't really phase him and he'd never been much for astronomy.  But now looking at them, he was struck by the sheer beauty and wonder of it all.

He continued to look as the twins finally broke their silence and started excitedly looking for the easy constellations Cassandra had picked out for them.  After a little while, Jake joined in the looking and told the twins the ancient tale about Ursa Major and Minor. 

They had their cookies and their hot chocolate, they found more constellations and a couple of planets.  They made wishes on shooting stars.  And finally the children fell silent,  Cassandra was pretty sure they'd dozed off, but Jake whispered that they could stay a little while longer if she wanted to.  She grinned at him and looked up.

"It's so gorgeous here," she whispered, "what painting does it remind you of?"

"A few, but it reminds me right now of a William Blake poem . . ."

Jake kissed her cheek and whispered the beginning of the poem into her ear. "Thou fair-haired angel of the evening, now whilst the sun rests on the mountains, light thy bright torch of love; thy radiant crown put on and smile upon our evening bed."

She smiled and snuggled in for just a moment then said, "was that our cue to leave?"

And Matt let out a little bit of a snore and Cassandra buried her face in Jake's neck as she giggled and he said, "yep."

They woke the twins enough to get them back into the cab of the truck and the children promptly fell asleep again until they arrived at the house.  Later, Cassandra and Jake were snuggled in bed in Jake's old room, both intending to settle in with their reading for the night.

Cassandra said, "thank you again for taking us out.  I think I enjoyed that as much as the kids did."

"I noticed," Jake chuckled. "It wasn't anything, I should have taken them out before. I kinda always took that view for granted.  And you know me, not that much into science."

"That's kinda my thing," she said. "Growing up in a city where the lights were always on, I never got to see stars like that . . .sometimes on those cruise ships, but I never was certain where I was, so I had no concept of what I was seeing."

Jake bit his lip, but said, "kinda sounds lonely."

"Sometimes it was," Cassandra said kissing his cheek. "Luckily your kids will always have each other and this wonderful family of yours."

He kissed her forehead and let the conversation die as they each picked up their books.  But this tiny spark of something had settled in around his heart and it didn't show signs of going away just yet. And at the moment he wasn't quite sure what it was or why it was bothering him so much.

* * *

The next day, Matt had asked to join his grandfather and Eve in the daily rounds. Bill had agreed with a chuckle coming out of the barn with a little cowboy hat that had once been Jake's.  Jake watched from the kitchen window as his father grinned down at a question that Matt had asked as they walked off.

His mother looked up from where she was starting turkey soup for lunch. "When did Matt become so interested in ranching?"

Jake shook his head and grabbed a cutting board to help. "I have no idea. At the fair he started asking me all these questions, suddenly he's crazy about it.  Daddy will be happy to have a young male that cared." And Jake's sigh was audible.  He hadn't meant to sound as bitter as he did.

His mother sighed in her own turn. "Jacob."

"I didn't mean it like that.  I know Daddy . . . ."

"Your Daddy loves you, Jacob Stone and you know good and well he does." But Jeannie did drop her head in defeat. " I know sometimes you felt trapped here."

"I just, I wasn't made for here, Mama.  And I never should have tried to make myself fit. That was a disaster.  But Daddy was always so disappointed . . . ."

"Your father was disappointed, but never in you, Jacob." She stopped her chopping and touched his arm. "You have to understand what having a son means to a man like your father.  After two daughters, he wanted so much for you to be just like he was, like his daddy and granddaddy. Another Stone working this land since they settled here."

"But I wasn't."

"No, you weren't.  And the Good Lord decided we were through with babies after you came along . . . ."

Jake looked over at his mother startled. "I'm sorry Mama, I didn't know that three wasn't a choice."

She shrugged. "Just as well, after your Daddy decided, especially after we realized how smart you and Eve were, that all y'all were gettin' an education.  And . . .well it was hard enough with three.  You got your football scholarship and Eve got an academic one, but there still were a lot of expenses for all of you."

"I'm not ungrateful, Mama. I know the sacrifices you made."

"I never said you were. Your Daddy and I, we made mistakes, Jake.  And so did you.  But, honey, isn't it time to move on?  I know you hold things in your heart a long time, like the time it took you to move on after dear May died."

Jake smiled softly, "and I think that only happened because . . . ."

"You met the right girl? Or because you think May sent you the right girl?"

"A little of both. I know it sounds crazy, Mama."

His mother smiled and patted his arm again, "I believe the Lord moves in mysterious ways darlin'. And if you think May put in a good word with Him to send you Cassandra, then who am I to argue?  But you know, May always wanted you to make it right with your Daddy."

"Cassandra does too. She doesn't come right out and say it but . . . ." Jake bit his lip. "Her father died when she was barely in her teens. And he meant so much to her. She's been subtle but I know she thinks I should appreciate him being around. And she's right. May should have been my lesson that life sometimes has different plans for you."

"Maybe you should listen to those wise women in your life then, son." Jeannie winked at him and went back to her cooking.

Jake grinned at her, but in the afternoon, he walked up to his father and asked him if he'd like to go for a ride.  And when they returned their horses to the barn later, tensions seemed to have eased quite a bit between father and son.


	7. Inside the Twister

A few days after the weekend in Oklahoma, Cassandra and Jake were talking while they made dinner.

"We should probably talk about what decorations you want to use," Jake said as he chopped an onion.  "And about how we want to handle the tree."

"Well, all I have is a little table top tree,  I never trusted Sparky with a big one and with just me, it seemed like a waste."

"Right, Sparky . . ."Jake sighed. "We always have a real tree, do you think he'll be a problem?  We can put it up in the den this year instead of the living room, that way we can close the door when we're not home."

Cassandra smiled, "I always wanted a real tree!  Mother was allergic so we never had one.  As it was, all of the decorations had to fit her designer style.  When I was little,  Dad and I would decorate the Christmas tree at his office.  I got to chose the theme and all the decorations.  Mother would sniff about what his clients must think, but I think they got a kick out of them honestly."  Cassandra smiled shyly, "I saved a couple of my favorite ornaments, they don't fit on my little tree, but do you think I could put them on yours?"

"Of course you can." Jake kissed her cheek in passing. "I told you that we're going to combine our decorations. This is as much your Christmas as it is ours. And I think the twins would love to hear about you and your dad."

"I am sorry about having to move the tree, I'm sure it would look better by the windows."

Jake shrugged, "better moved then knocked down if that feline of yours decides to get up to no good. And if he's fine then next year we'll put it in there.  Maybe we can move that table out of the guest room and put your little tree up on it by the window instead."

Cassandra grinned, "you are just full of ideas!"

"Well, it may ruin my reputation but I am quite fond of Christmas."

Cassandra smiled, "I am too.  It's so pretty and cheerful and festive.  I'd love there to be more snow, but I suppose I'd rather not have the messy roads. And maybe we'll get a flurry or two, it's been known to happen. It'll be cold enough to snuggle up by the fire.  Which is one of my favorite things, I loved my tiny fireplace in my apartment and yours is so nice."

"I noticed, I'm gonna run out of firewood!"

Cassandra giggled and he shook his head at her.  They carried on their dinner preparations, occasionally mentioning something or another about decorations, which they planned on putting up on the weekend.  

Jake had just finished up dinner and said, "and maybe after dinner we can sit down with the kids and talk about what Christmas stuff we want to do? Make a list and see what we can actually accomplish?"

Cassandra sighed, "I would love to but I have to call my mother this evening. She called when I was at work and I told her I'd call her back."

Jake nodded, "tomorrow night then. "  He walked out of the kitchen, "Matt, Maggie! Wash up, it's dinner time!"

* * *

 

Jake had gone up to check on the kids, they'd both gotten a stack of new books today at the library and they pretty much had barely acknowledged his presence when he opened their doors, being so engrossed in their reading.

He'd smiled as he shut the door to Matt's room, having gotten identical responses from both twins. There was something to be said for the peace and quiet that came from having children that were bookworms.   Not that the quiet was always the case, not by a long shot, but maybe he and Cassandra could take advantage of the quiet when she got off the phone.  The kids being engrossed in their books meant they could enjoy a movie or more likely some necking on the sofa without being interrupted.

He was in a pretty good mood from that thought when he opened the door to the den.  Cassandra was still on the phone, her back to him but her body posture was rigid.  Well there went the necking idea, he should have realized that more often than not, Cassandra's conversations with her mother called for him to comfort her afterwards.

"I don't know Mother," Jake could hear Cassandra say. "I just moved into my new place and . . . ." Cassandra sighed. "Well, yes, obviously money is tight right now. I just don't think this year is a good idea to come home.  And I doubt you'd . . . . Of course not. No, I do understand that you have to get to your bridge game. I will call you later.  Goodbye, Mother."

Cassandra pinched the bridge of her nose as Jake made his presence known. She gave him a weak smile.

"Makin' excuses not to see your mama?"

She nodded a little sheepishly.

"Well, you know if you want to go see her, it's okay. I've said it before, you had a life before me and I can't ask you to give it all up."

"It's just well . . . ."

"Oh, you haven't told her we're livin' together?" Jake smiled kindly. "Little secret, May and I moved in together before we got married too.  Like the last two years of college, actually. Her mama still doesn't know." He chuckled. "I mean I get that you're way older than we were, but parents ain't ever easy, no matter how old you are . . . So you know I do get it."

"No, Jake, you really don't."

Jake looked confused. "Honey, what am I missin' here?"

Cassandra looked pained, in near tears.

"I get you don't have the greatest relationship with her, but what's goin' on, Cassie? This is bigger than you just neglecting to tell your mom you moved in with your boyfriend. I mean, is she givin' you a hard time about bein' with a widower with kids? Is that it?"

Cassandra tore her eyes away from him, looking down at the floor. "Umm, I sorta . . ."

"You sorta what?" Jake's voice now was carrying a hint of impatience to it. He was trying hard to keep that under control but Cassandra was acting uncharacteristically skittish.

"I . . ." and then a sob broke loose from her throat. "I've never told her about you. At all."

It was very quiet for about 20 seconds, Cassandra counted them all as she slowly lifted her head. Jake's expression was one she'd never seen before. He seemed very calm but a shiver went down her spine just the same.

On the 21st second . . .

"What?  I'm pretty damn sure I didn't hear ya right.  Did you just tell me that you've never told your mama about me?"

"That's what I said," came as a whisper.

"Six months," and Jake's voice was now at a seethe. "Six months. **Six months,** Cassandra." He paced the living room. "I can understand you not tellin' her we live together. Or maybe not tellin' her right away we were datin'. But we've been together for **SIX MONTHS**!"

Cassandra backed up at the force of his shout.  He once confessed to her that he did have a dark side, but she'd only seen the briefest flashes of it. They'd had disagreements, all couples did, but he'd never been more than annoyed with her.  Never this, the full force of his anger directed straight at her and she had to admit she was frightened. Annoyed Jake she could handle, angry Jake . . . .  And it didn't help that along with the anger, she could see hurt.  And she could only imagine how deep that went, probably deeper than his anger and that, that was all her fault, she could only imagine what was going through his mind right now, what he thought her reasons were.   

"I . . . ."

"So what? Were you not going to tell her until after we got married?  Make up some excuse to me why your mama wasn't at the wedding?  Were you going to tell her after we had babies? Or maybe, I don't know Cassandra, when they start high school, you might offhand mention to your mother, oh I got married and had some kids?"

Sarcastic Jake was not something Cassandra was familiar with at all and she backed up another step.

"Are you gonna say anything? Anything at all to explain to me why the hell you wouldn't tell your own mother about me? "

"I was trying to . . . ." Her eyes were filling with tears and she could barely see him anymore. Though she could hear his angry pacing.

Then suddenly he stopped and was silent.  Cassandra wiped her eyes and looked over at him.  His face was pale now, anger still lingering but the pain was more evident.

"Are you ashamed of me?"

"What?" Cassandra was taken aback. "No! That's not why . . . ."

"Your family is well off, you've said as much.  Your fiancé was a businessman, he would have kept you in the style you grew up in. And your mother is ashamed of what you do, isn't that right?"

"Yes . . ."

"So were you ashamed to tell her that I was just a man from Oklahoma with two kids working in the arts? I keep us comfortable but it'll never be what you had growing up.  Were you afraid of what she'd say?"

It was so close to the mark. So close to what she'd been afraid of, that she finally nodded. She couldn't get her voice to work, but he turned away from her.

The silence stretched for minutes. Cassandra couldn't even count them, her heart was aching and her head was pounding. And what was worse was the ache in her arms from wanting to throw them around him and tell him that it wasn't him at all.  That it all was her and her mother.  But she couldn't even get herself to move, let alone speak or explain.

Finally he spoke, his voice soft but it was still full of anger. "I think I need to go . . . spend the night at Eve's or somethin'.  I just . . .right now . . .I'll say somethin' I can't take back."

"No!" Cassandra finally got her voice to work. "I'll go. I'm not having you leave your home or your children for something that is my fault. Jake . .. I love you. I have a really good reason why . . . ."

Jake closed his eyes. "I know you love me.  And I do, I love you.  It's just . . .right now . . .Cassandra, you get what I'm tryin' to say right?"

Cassandra nodded. "You're too angry to talk about this and I'm too . . ."

"And I don't wanna . . . .please Cassandra, just go before we do somethin' stupid. Please?"

She nodded and all but ran upstairs to get an overnight bag and call Ezekiel.   His expression hadn't changed much when she came back down, awkwardly speaking. "I'm going to be at Ezekiel's. If the kids ask . . . ."

"I'm gonna ask Eve to take them for the night. I can't . . . ."

"Yeah, of course. Jake . . . ."

"I know, okay, I know. If I didn't love you so damn much I wouldn't be askin' you to leave . . . ."

"You'd be breaking up with me."

Jake didn't answer but she knew that was the case.  And then she shut the front door behind her.  She'd asked Ezekiel to come pick her up, being too afraid to drive when she was in this state.

She could feel the weight of Jake's stare through the window as she sat on the steps for the three minutes it took Ezekiel to show up. And then saw the curtain shut as she looked back at the house once Ezekiel pulled away from the curb.

"What the hell did you do?" Ezekiel asked.

"Not right now, Ezekiel. I just need a friend, can you do that?"

The younger man nodded. "Yeah, let's get you home."


	8. Aftermath, Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shout out to PyreWrites who left a comment on an earlier chapter that inspired part of this conversation.

Cassandra lay on Ezekiel's couch staring at the ceiling.  It was past midnight and she could hear Ezekiel snoring in his room.  It wasn't that his couch was uncomfortable, she'd slept on it a couple of times before she'd met Jake.  She'd dozed off a few times, but her mind wouldn't let her go to sleep completely. Instead she kept thinking about Jake. What he was doing, how he was feeling. And berating herself for not being honest with him.

She should have told him months ago about why she was hiding her relationship from her mother. Maybe he would have understood.  They'd made a pact after all to be honest with each other, no matter how tough it was. And there she was, hiding this from him for so long.

The clock on the microwave in the kitchen clicked to quarter to one and she heard her phone vibrate in the charger on the floor near the lamp.  Curious as to what it could be at this hour, she slid the phone off the charger and looked at it.

A single text from Jake.  _Please come home._

She took a deep breath. _Are u sure?_

_Please just come home. We'll both call in sick in the morning and we'll talk. I doubt you slept either._

_No. But he's sleeping . . ._

Ezekiel chose that moment to wander into the living room on his way to the kitchen. "Kid, are you still up?"

"Can you take me home?"

Ezekiel rolled his eyes, but minutes later, he was dropping her off outside the front door.

"Hey," Jake said softly to her as he opened the door.  He looked, well a lot like how she imagined she did. His hair was mussed from repeatedly running his hands through it and his eyes were suspiciously red. "Thanks for coming back."

"I didn't want to go . . . . Jake, I . . . ."

"We'll talk in the morning.  Long talk, okay?  Eve's got the kids and she'll take them to school. And Flynn already knows you won't be in and I sent an email in to my work.  Just come up to bed."

She nodded.  She hadn't even changed back into her street clothes, just her shoes, so she left her bag and shoes by the door and followed him up.

They didn't speak as they got into bed, but he grabbed her when she tried to roll away and arranged her against his chest, the way she always slept.  And as he turned off the light, she felt his lips brush against her forehead.  Then exhausted and once again safe in his arms, she fell asleep.

* * *

 

In the morning, still in their pajamas, they sat in the living room, opposite sides of the sofa.  Jake didn't look angry any more, but he did look sad.

He took a deep breath, "well?"

Cassandra bit her lip, pulled her legs up to her chest and took a deep breath of her own. "I was trying to protect you and the kids."

"From your mother?  It's not like May didn't have an overbearing busybody of a mother, you know. I still have to deal with her. I can handle yours."

Cassandra shook her head. "I don't think your mother-in-law is even in the same league as my mother . . .  ."

"Really? You'd be surprised." Jake's eyes flashed with anger, but Cassandra quickly realized that this anger wasn't directed at her and rather at his mother-in-law. "Do you know what I've gone through with that woman?"

"Well, your mom said she basically demanded you guys get married . . . ."

Jake scoffed. "Please, we wanted to get married. No, that's not what . . . ." A low growl escaped his throat. "Great, now this is back in my head."

"What did she do?" Cassandra was a little less frightened of Jake's anger now, especially since it was obvious it was fully focused elsewhere.

Jake jumped to his feet, walked over to the bookcase where a photo of Mabel and the twins as infants was displayed. "May was gone less than two weeks . . .and she tried to take my babies from me."

"What? No!"

"I was . . . well you can imagine what I was goin' through. I was pretty much just functionin'. The babies didn't really understand what was goin' on. She had been watchin' them one afternoon while Mama, Eve and I were doin' somethin', can't even remember what. We came home and she had them and their stuff packed up in her car, headin' for Oklahoma."

"No . . . ."

"I honestly . . .it was not my finest hour. I just boiled, Eve says I just stood in the yard screamin' until I collapsed. Eve and Mama, though . . .thank God for them. They basically ran her off that day.  But then she got a lawyer . . . ."

"That's . . .wow."

"She threatened to take me to court, sue for custody of her grandchildren."  Jake sighed. "Eventually between May's dad and my parents, she dropped it.  Did have social services over here because of the whole thing, but luckily they sided with me and the twins never actually left my care."

"And you still take them to see her?"

"Well," Jake pinched the bridge of his nose. "She's their family. And May's daddy is a good man, I'd prefer them only to see him but I can't do anything about that. And Cassie, by now you should know how important family is to me."

Cassandra's voice was soft, "But for the most part, your family is always there for you. Thick and thin, the Stones stick together." She sighed and Jake's heart clenched. "Not so much for me. After hearing about Mrs. Collins . . .I don't want to put your children through someone like that again. Our children.  What she did to me . . .Jake, I don't want her to be around my children."

Jake nodded and moved back to the sofa, sitting next to her this time. "I get that, honey, I do."

"You were so angry."

"I was," Jake admitted. "But . . .okay yeah . . .it felt like you didn't think I was important enough to you . . .but a lot of it was that you could have told me long ago why.  But you didn't and we'd made that promise .  . . Do you remember, Cassandra?  To be honest?"

"I know, but . . . ."

"You know me, don't you? I thought you trusted me." And that hurt crept back into Jake's voice.

"I do! Jake, it's not you I don't trust. It's my mother."

Jake threw his head back against the back of the sofa in his impatience. For the first time since he met Cassandra, he was finding it difficult to get through to her. He was starting to understand though. Cassandra was terrified of her mother.  May had been scared of her mother too, but not like this.

"Bear with me for a minute. You know all that fairy tale stuff that Maggie keeps throwing around?"

"Sure . . . ." Cassandra looked confused but nodded.

"Look, just like with May, I'm not gonna ride in and slay the dragon for you. I don't do that. I will admit to being a bit of a white knight but I like a damsel who can hold her own. What I will do, what I did with May, is hand you a sword and stand right next to you and fight that dragon with you. I will fight at your side for the rest of your life, Cassandra, but you have to let me.  And you have to be willing to fight this dragon.  Even if that dragon is yourself."

And that, that finally got through to her. And she nodded. "I'm sorry Jake. I should have told you months ago about how scared I was of her. How I didn't know what to say. How I feared what she would say to you.  But it was so much easier just avoiding her."

Then Cassandra launched into an explanation of why she was so afraid of her mother.  Her mother was from a well to do old money family, always about appearances.  She was extremely domineering and controlling, verbally abusive at times. Cassandra's father had always been on Cassandra's side, but he was dominated and abused by his wife as well and very busy trying to keep the family in the style to which his wife demanded. Cassandra had never felt like she measured up to her mother and her expectations.

"She wanted a social deb, someone like her and her family. She ended up with math girl." Cassandra sighed. "And I never fit in with what she wanted or with that crowd. So then she shifted gears. If I couldn't fit in in order to marry into money, then she wanted me to make money.  So I got pressured into going into business."

"Which explains why she was so upset with you becoming a librarian," Jake nodded, now holding Cassandra's hand. "And why you're afraid of what her reaction to me would be."

She nodded. "David was acceptable." She sighed. "And I honestly thought . . .but I made a mistake with him. He was my escape, you know? He was part of that crowd but I thought he liked me for me. I wasn't a Manhattan socialite like all of the others. I was me in my little floral dresses, though mind you they were expensive floral dresses back then, my mother made me wear designer stuff no matter what. With my math skills and my lab coat. I thought he loved me for me. And he was my escape. My way out of that house, my way away from my mother and her desperation after Dad died."

"But he wasn't and he didn't." Jake sighed.

"He was in his own way as domineering and controlling as my mother.  But I didn't notice or chose not to notice. I focused on getting married and having children that I could raise the way I wanted to be raised.  But there were little things . . . ." Cassandra hugged her knees to her chest again, dropping Jake's hand. "Later after we broke up . . . .one of the very few friends I had, she called me, telling me what she'd heard. Told me I dodged a bullet. He'd been cheating on me the entire time and my friend's boyfriend had nearly punched him when he was talking down about me at a party. That my migraines made me socially unacceptable."

Jake growled. "You should have let me kick his ass."

Cassandra smirked slightly. "That's the world I come from. That's what I knew of family. Especially after my father died. I was just  . . . my mother loved the money more. More than she loved me or my father. Honestly, I don't understand why she didn't just remarry some rich guy instead of expecting me to take care of her. She berates me every time I talk to her about my 'life choices'. How I threw away everything they've done for me to be some hipster in the South. Or whatever.  And despite all the money we lost on the wedding? She still gets after me for not running to David and begging him to take me back. Assumes I did something to turn him off. I can't expose you to her."

"Cassandra . . ." Her name came out on a sigh. "Don't you think last night could have been avoided if you'd have let me make that choice?"

She nodded. "Yes, I'm sorry. I just I thought I was doing the right thing.  I'm . . .oh Jake, I'm just not used to someone like you.  No one . . ." Her eyes started watering and Jake moved closer as she collapsed against his shoulder in tears. "No one but my dad had ever loved me before you and your kids."

"Oh honey," Jake soothed. Part of him wanted to assure her that her mother probably did love her. But he had a feeling that Cassandra simply didn't believe that.  And any of his anger that might have remained disappeared.  So much about Cassandra was explained, she'd not had a happy marriage as an example growing up, the man she'd loved had betrayed her so badly and her mother hadn't provided her with the unconditional love and support she deserved.  "It's alright. I'm so sorry. I didn't understand . . .oh, sweetheart, I wish you'd told me all of this. I'm on your side, always on your side. Okay?  Whatever you want to tell your mother, it's okay with me. I get why you'd want to cut her out of your life. I do."

"I think I need to tell her." Cassandra sniffled. "But I don't want her to be a part of our lives. Nowhere near your twins and especially not near our own babies. Ever.  I just don't know how to tell her that."

"When you're ready to tell her, I'll be right by your side. You know that right?"

She nodded against his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Jake.  You've never given me a reason not to trust you with this. But so many people have let me down. . . .And I'm not used to having someone I can count on."

"One night you told me I wasn't alone any more. And it goes both ways, okay? We're a team. You're never gonna be alone again, alright? Never again, sweetheart."

"I love you so much Jake. So very much."

"I love you too, Cassie. So very much." The kiss he gave her was a little watery, but that was to be expected. "And honey, about last night . . . ."

"You had every right to be angry. This was big and I didn't trust you with it. After we'd promised to be honest with each other.  And you were right to put distance between us."

"I didn't want to . . .I get very angry sometimes and I say things I shouldn't. And I needed you out of my sight before I did something terrible and lost you. Five minutes after you left . . . I almost picked up the phone.  But then I thought I should cool down a bit more and let you have your space. I'm glad you came home."

"I'm glad you held me. I . . .I needed that assurance that we'd be okay in the end."

"Me too.  So now you know about that damn temper of mine. I try really hard to keep it under control."

"Next time I know that you need distance to get over it. It'll be okay. We'll be okay. We will be right?"

"Of course we will. C'mere." Jake pulled her on his lap and she curled up against his chest. "We're okay." And he kissed the side of her head.


	9. Aftermath, Part 2

"You want some breakfast?" Jake asked finally, after they'd spent several minutes just holding each other on the couch.

"In a minute," Cassandra took a deep breath. "I wanted to ask you about something."

"Yeah?"

She bit her lip, not quite sure how to ask, but decided just to be direct. "You don't really think I'm ashamed of you, do you?  My mother is a snob, I am not."

Jake sighed but his voice was soft and the answer directed at the back of her head. "No, I don't think you are.  But that doesn't stop that damn little voice in my head. The one that whispers that I'm not good enough for you."

"I know a lot about little voices." Cassandra sighed. "One sounds a lot like my mother."

"You have two?"

"That's the insecurity, the nagging worry, the 'when is the other shoe going to drop.'  Then there's the guilt. The one that likes to remind me that your wife died for me to be happy."

"And that's the new voice.  I kinda had a feelin' about that guilt.  May had a voice that sounded like her mother too." Jake pulled her in closer. "I seem to have this thing for girls with voices in their heads. But then I've tried to ignore the one in my own head for a really long time."

Cassandra nodded. "It was there with May too, right? She was a city girl?"

"Yeah, from Tulsa, the great-grandmother she's named for was an oil heiress, though the family was really more middle class."

"And did May remind you that you're a good man? That's all that matters to me. I'm sure that's all that mattered to her."

Jake's voice caught. "She did."

"I know from little voices, Jacob. I know that I can reassure you until I'm blue in the face. And you can do the same with me. And it'll still be back there howling in the darkness.  But . . .it helps to hear it.  I replay what you say to me over and over and I hold you in the dark and then it shuts up."  She turned on his lap so she could see his face. "You are a good man, Jacob Stone.  And you are a great father.   Do you remember our first date?"

"Yeah," Jake looked a little confused.

"You confided in me that you were starting to think about looking for a better paying job and remember I discouraged you?"

He nodded. "You were right, I'd be miserable. But sometimes . . .especially since you want to have a baby . . . another mouth to feed . . .and I really want to have more kids with you, but we have to think of these things."

Cassandra smiled softly. "My mother was desperate that I get married.  Why would that be? Not so much that she could move in with me. . . ."

Jake quickly made the connection, he shouldn't have been that surprised. "You have a trust fund."

"Yep. Which I do not have control of until I marry and my mother has no control over at all. She was hoping that I'd feel grateful about her introducing me to David and she'd be able to stop working. Not that she ever worked more than part time, but that's too much for her.  My trust fund isn't that large as trust funds go but I want to use it for my dream just like I want you to keep pursuing yours."

Jake wasn't quite sure where she was going with this but just asked, "and what's your dream?"

"All my life I dreamed of belonging somewhere.  A house with . . ." she smiled, "a white picket fence and a cat. A husband who loved me for who I was and who supported my dreams and who had dreams of his own that I supported completely. A bunch of smart adorable children that their father and I would raise to be themselves, not what society wanted. And we'd love them no matter what. And it seemed like I would never ever have that dream come true." She smiled warmly at him, "until I met a widower with two children who promised his wife that he'd support his kids' dreams no matter what. And I started to dream my dream again. I want to be a mama, Jake. I want to be the stay at home mom that my mother never was. Oh she stayed at home, but I was raised by the help. I want to home school the twins like May wanted, I want to experience all my babies' firsts, I want to bake brownies for the bake sales and take the kids to soccer practice.  My trust fund isn't huge, but then neither is my salary and well, I can do a complex budget in my head.  When we're ready to start our family, then we'll follow my dream.  Until then, you keep following yours, okay?"

Jake's eyes were definitely watery by the time she stopped talking. "Cassie, I don't de-"

She cut him off, putting her finger on his lips. "Do not say you don't deserve me.  After the hell that we both have been through, I think it's time we get our reward. Our voices can just go . . .jump off a cliff for all I care. I deserve you, you deserve me. Okay?"

Jake nodded and removed her finger from his lips.  But he didn't say anything, just tugged her down to meet his lips and kissed her hungrily. One kiss lead to another and soon her fingers were threaded through his hair and one of his hands crept under her pajama top. The kisses continued, growing in passion and soon he'd lifted her top over her head and threw it behind her onto the floor.

"Here?" she murmured through a moan as he hit a sweet spot on her neck.

"Yeah, okay?"

"Yes, here is . . ."she gasped as his hands wandered. "Perfect."

"Good."

Then she giggled as suddenly her bare back hit the sofa and Jake settled his weight on her, cutting off her giggles with a kiss.

* * *

 

Sometime later, now dressed for the day, they were finally having breakfast.

Cassandra was staring at her coffee, lost in thought when Jake's voice broke into them. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"I was . . .how much did the kids hear?"

Jake nodded, "ah. Yeah, we need to talk to them when they get back from school.  They heard me shouting at you, but no words. They were asking a million questions and . . . ."

"You got a little short with them?" Cassandra asked gently, squeezing his hand across the table.

"Yeah, not proud of that either. Maggie was cryin'. Eve took one look at my face and knew what was up.  So she started spinning a tale of how they were all gonna have the most fun sleepover ever as she left with them.  Her first period is her free one, which is good for getting the kids into school for me, but not for me callin' to see how it went."

"She would have called if they were really upset.  Eve's probably the best person to handle it, she knows you better than anyone."

Jake let out a snort but he shrugged. "You're probably right. I'm the baby after all, so she's known me my whole life. And she probably does know me better than anyone but our mother."

"Still, though, I think we have to talk about how we're going to explain this to them.  And how we're going to handle disagreements in the future."

"Never in front of them. We probably should have talked about this before, but we've never actually had this come up. Any of the other times we've . . . ."

"Had disagreements, this was a fight, all the others were just normal friction. Which haven't been in front of them.  It's sensible not to fight in front of them. I'm sure you and May . . . ."

"Oh, we had our share of fights too," Jake actually chuckled. "That woman had a temper like a fire cracker. But when she got pregnant, we made a deal to never fight in front of them. And we should as well.  We're probably less likely to fight than May and I were, but still . . . ."

She smiled. "Okay, see agreement there. We take it out of the room.  But we still have to explain last night. I left, they left.  And they're gonna be scared. They have friends with divorced parents . . . ."

"And they do remember when I broke it off with Hope. She was here one day and gone the next. They were a little easier to explain things to back then, but now, they're older and . . ."Jake shut his eyes in pain. "I didn't mean to scare my babies, Cassie."

"Hey, none of that.  I have my share of blame in this.  And you . . .you're human, Jake.  We all do things we don't mean. We'll just explain that sometimes these things happen.  And that you and I still love each other and we're still together and everything will be okay."

He grabbed her hand across the table and brought it up to his lips, kissing the back of it. "Thank you."

* * *

 

Eve had told the twins to ride the bus home as usual that afternoon.   So Cassandra and Jake were waiting for them at the bus stop.  Cassandra had also talked Jake into baking a batch of chocolate chip cookies for their after school snack.  Jake generally preferred to give them healthy things right after school,  especially since they'd just gotten back from Thanksgiving. But Cassandra had pointed out that it was a peace offering of sorts and they'd divide up the majority amongst their co-workers.  And he figured every now and then rules could be bent.

The kids looked a little nervous when they got off the bus but their faces brightened up when they saw Cassandra standing by their father, holding his hand.

She knelt down when they came running up, both of them nearly knocking her over trying to hug her at the same time.

"Easy now," Jake said, "Cassie doesn't want to get broken."

"You . . ."Maggie sniffled. "You were gone and then we were sent away."

"And we didn't know . . .Aunt Eve said it wasn't anything to worry about. But you were gone and Daddy was mad." And Matt sniffled himself.

"I know, sweethearts." Cassandra said, giving them each one more hug. "Let's go home and talk about it, okay?"

At home, the kids were settled around the kitchen table with glasses of milk and cookies. Cassandra looked at Jake, not quite sure how to proceed. 

Jake grabbed her hand and took a deep breath. Sent a quick appeal to May for guidance and started to speak. "I am real sorry about being short with you last night.  I wasn't mad at either of you and nothing that happened last night had anything at all to do with you."

"But why did we get sent away?" Matt asked.

Jake closed his eyes and thought about the answer.  The truth was easiest with his bright children. "Cassandra and I had a . . . ."

"Fight," Maggie supplied. "I could hear you yelling at her."

"Yes.  And I have . . .I am not proud of it at all.  But I have a really bad temper.  Your mama used to say my temper was like a twister and it was best to head straight for the storm shelter than to be anywhere near it.  And she was right.  I called your Aunt Eve to take you for the night because I didn't want you caught up in the twister. Does that make sense?"

Both twins nodded, their eyes wide.

"Your Aunt Eve has been dealing with me since I was a baby, I knew she was the best person to keep you safe.  And I sent Cassandra away too because I wanted her to be safe."

"You're not . . . ."Maggie's voice was soft. "She's not goin' away like Miss Hope or like Jenny's daddy?"

"Or Jason's mama?" asked Matt.

Cassandra smiled softly, "no, I'm not going anywhere. Your Dad and I love each other.  We said that we were sorry and everything is good now.  Sometimes adults have disagreements, but most of the time they can just talk through them and apologize.  We're just terribly sorry that we scared you.  Everyone makes mistakes . . .I made a big mistake and your daddy was right in being angry with me."

"And I made a mistake in scaring you and how I handled some other things.   But remember what we learn in church about forgiveness?"

The twins both nodded and echoed, "yes."

"Well, Cassandra and I forgave each other.  And I really hope you can forgive us for givin' you a scare. Okay?"

"Okay," said Maggie, getting up and hugging first her father than Cassandra.

"Yeah," nodded Matt.  He didn't hug, but he ate the cookie he'd just been staring at through the whole conversation. "Can I have another cookie?"

Jake wasn't sure why that struck him as so funny but he just started laughing.  Cassandra giggled herself and Maggie looked at both of them strangely. Then back at her brother, "adults are weird."

And Matt was in total agreement.


	10. Deck The Halls

They had decided to put the decorations up that weekend, though Cassandra had to work a half day at the library. So they decided to get the tree on Sunday after church and Saturday would be the rest of the decorations.  Jake and the kids had been up with her in the morning and he told her he was going out to buy a few more decorations while she was at work.

When Cassandra pulled up at one, she noticed that several Christmas lawn decorations were already up on their lawn including an entire herd of reindeer, a snowman and a giant candy cane.  Jake's truck was in the driveway and there were several boxes and a sleigh in it.

An excited looking Maggie and a slightly bored looking Matt came to greet her in the garage.

"Where's your daddy?" she asked them, grabbing her bag out of the backseat.

"He's putting the ladder up round back," Matt said.

"He's back," Maggie said, looking excited and rushing over to the truck.

"What on Earth is going on?" Cassandra asked as she followed Maggie to the truck, Matt trailing along behind.  Cassandra's eyes widened when she saw just how many boxes were still in the truck.  "I thought you were getting a couple of things.  Do they even allow this much stuff in the neighborhood?"

At that question, both twins laughed.

Jake grinned. "It's a tradition.  We have a neighborhood decorating contest, kinda a 50-50 thing, entry is $20 and the winner gets half the pot and the other half goes to Make A Wish.  But it's the braggin' rights we all go for.  And the Hendersons . . . ." Jake made a face as he looked down the street to the first house in the subdivision. "They win every year.  But this year, this year is **mine**!"

Cassandra couldn't quite argue with his enthusiasm even if it was a totally different side to her boyfriend. "Well,  alright then."

"I wanna help!" Maggie said.

"Okay,  why don't you start with the tree I set up on the porch? It's already lit, so all you have to do is use the box of big plastic ornaments that's over there. Then you can put the birdseed balls out on the evergreen."

"Yes!" Maggie said, rushing off to the porch.

Jake turned to his son. "Matt . . . ." then trailed off as he realized that while his daughter was as eager as he was, his son looked less than thrilled. "Oh."

"I was going to start to make my Christmas cookies," Cassandra said to Matt. "Would you like to help with that?"

Matt's eyes lit up. "Yes!"

"Okay, go on in and wash up and put an apron on. I'll be right there."

Jake chuckled as Matt ran into the house. "Okay, so maybe I am a little much."

Cassandra kissed his cheek. "You're competitive. I get it.  And in that respect, Maggie is more like you than Matt is."

"Matt's a Stone," Jake said kissing her on the lips in response. "Steady like a rock my daddy used to say. The competitive streak, that's the Baird in me. And Maggie too, though she's just more into decorating."

"Well, Matt is very much your son," Cassandra said, "Though I'm not sure how he'll be able to be a world class baker and run," and she made air quotes, "the biggest ranch in Oklahoma, at the same time like he told me last week."

Jake laughed and reached for a box. "If anyone can do it, it's be one of my kids."

"Yeah, I better get in the house before he starts baking without me. I don't want to run out of flour again.  Be careful out here."

"Yes, dear." Jake said with a playful tone and she rolled her eyes at him and grinned.

* * *

 

Cassandra and Matt were decorating cookies and trying to ignore the sounds of banging and sometimes crashing that came from outside. These were punctuated by the occasional muffled curse word, sometimes Matt would giggle when he'd figure out what the word was, though most of the time it went over his head.

That was until a very loud crash and a very loud, very bad word drifted into the kitchen.  Matt's eyes went really wide and Cassandra turned red.

"Okay, that's not an okay word for you to use, you understand?" she asked Matt and he nodded, still wide eyed.

Cassandra sighed and looked worried now that she'd said that. "I hope your daddy is okay. He doesn't often use that word."

"Daddy got hurt!" Maggie said running in and looking a little frantic. "And he used a very bad word."

"That's not okay for you to use." Cassandra repeated and then looked at the twins. "Maggie, why don't you wash your hands and help Matt? I'm gonna go check on your dad."

What Cassandra found on the front lawn could be described as reindeer carnage.  The entire herd of reindeer was all over the ground and a giant Santa had landed on two of them.  Jake was kneeling on the ground, looking upset and wincing at his hand which was bleeding.

"What happened?"                                             

"I put the Santa in the sleigh and went around to straighten the lights on the side of the house.  And then Maggie shrieked, I came running around and she's pointing at the sleigh. And the Santa is toppling over and before I could get near it, it crushed two reindeer and knocked all the others down."

Cassandra bit her lip to keep from laughing because Jake's tone was so distraught. "And your hand?"

"Rudolph. . .his nose broke. Cut my hand on the glass."

"Ouch," Cassandra knelt and took his hand in hers. It was bleeding but the cut was shallow, easy to bandage. "This is just gonna sting a bit, it's not too bad."

"This is such a disaster, Cassandra.  I'm hoping the ones under Santa are okay.  But Rudolph, he's . . . ruined."

Cassandra did laugh. He sounded exactly like his six year olds.

"Well, we can clean up the glass and he can just be a reindeer."

"He can't be just a reindeer!  He's Rudolph!  You need the red nose.  Just a reindeer ain't gonna beat the Hendersons, Cassie!"

Cassandra started shaking her head. "Okay, then we just buy a new one."

"That was the last one they had," Jake whined. "I don't know what I'm gonna do now."

"Oh my God, Clark Griswold, come into the house and clean up that cut. And I'll call the store and see if any of their other locations have it in stock."

He grinned at her and Cassandra softened just a little in her exasperation. "Thank you, sweetheart."

"Oh and Jacob?  About that word you used?"

"Oh, right." And Jake had the grace to turn red. "They heard that, didn't they?"

"Maggie was right there, Jake. And you were so loud that Matt and I heard it inside. I talked to them about it, but you're their dad."

"Yeah, we'll have a talk."

They went inside and Jake called the twins into the guest bath to talk to them while he bandaged his hand.  And Cassandra got her phone out with a shake of her head.

* * *

 

A new Rudolph was obtained from a store in a nearby town.  And Cassandra had to keep her giggles down when Jake came home with yet another bit of lawn decoration as well.  She tried not to think about how much this was all going to cost them, but he had mentioned that many of them he'd bought years ago and reused.

After dinner, armed with mugs of hot chocolate and a cookie each for dessert, they all trooped out to the sidewalk in front of the house for the unveiling of the lights.

And Cassandra had to admit despite her initial misgivings that suddenly their yard looked just like a Christmas amusement park.  Both kids were delighted and their father was absolutely beaming.

He put an arm around Cassandra, looking very proud of himself.

"So is this your year?" She asked teasingly.

But the look he gave her back was loving and serious. "It certainly is."

She smiled back, almost shyly and then leaned over and kissed him. He tasted like cocoa and cookies but the kiss didn't last too long as the twins interrupted them.  Matt with sounds of disgust and his sister with cooing sounds of delight.

"C'mon into the house with you, elves," Jake chuckled breaking away from his girlfriend.   And she heard her mutter something about them never letting him have any fun as he herded the kids inside.

* * *

 

The next afternoon, the perfect tree (as determined by a whole lot of negotiation and opinion at the tree lot) was standing in the den, the lights having been put on it, waiting for the rest of its decorations.

Their first stop that afternoon had been to Hallmark to buy four ornaments for the tree.  As part of Jake and Cassandra's attempts to create their own memories, Cassandra had come up with the idea of buying each one of them choosing new ornaments every year.  Jake and the twins had liked it and they'd all had fun choosing just the right one that suited their personalities.   Maggie had chosen Belle from Beauty and the Beast with her horse.  Matt had wanted Star Wars and finally picked Darth Vader wearing a Christmas sweater.  Cassandra couldn't resist one of a kitten trying to get into a bird feeder.  Cassandra had jokingly shown Jake a Clark Griswold ornament but he ended up choosing a Western Tanager.  It was gorgeous and like a mini work of art, so Cassandra knew why he'd chosen it. 

Cassandra had taken the kids to the truck while Jake paid so he presented her with one more ornament as they went to hang them on the tree.

It was a snowflake that said "Our Christmas Together 2015."  And Cassandra, teary eyed, threw her arms around Jake's neck in thank you.  The kids, this time, decided not to interrupt.

Cassandra had asked that all the special ornaments be hung up first and then they'd fill in the rest of the tree with other ornaments. Their new ones got put up first, with Jake hanging the snowflake in the center of the tree near the top.

Then an assortment of ornaments that the kids had made in school or had been given as gifts were put up.  Jake was a little wistful when he unwrapped two "Baby's First Christmas" ornaments that May had bought. Cassandra put a hand on his arm when he'd handed the ornaments off to the twins to put on the tree.

"It's okay," he said softly. "I can't believe sometimes how old they are. It seems only yesterday that she bought those. They were only 5 months old that Christmas, but at least she got another one with them where they were old enough to enjoy it."

Cassandra smiled softly and ran her finger over another ornament she'd lifted from the box.  Jake looked at her when he'd realized what it was.  It was an old ornament, from his first married Christmas with Mabel.

"If you don't . . . ."

Cassandra shook her head firmly. "Nope, we're putting this on the tree. This is Mabel's home too and I want her to be comfortable."

Now it was Jake's turn to give Cassandra a teary eyed hug.  How he got so lucky to meet two such women and have the second one so understand everything, he really didn't know. "Thank you," he whispered against her neck.

They continued to hang up ornaments, telling stories about each one. There were ornaments from vacations including a few from a trip to Europe that May and Jake had taken before the kids were born.

"We think she got pregnant on that trip," Jake whispered to Cassandra out of ear shot of the kids. "So keep that in mind if we ever go." And then he winked at her.

Her giggle was interrupted by Maggie calling her name.

"What was that, Maggie?" Cassandra asked coming back over to the boxes.

"I wondered what these were. They look old."

"Oh!" Cassandra exclaimed. "These three are mine.  My mother was always very particular about the tree in our house, so my dad used to let me decorate the tree at his work.  We'd plan out the themes every year.  These are my three favorites: that's a swan from the Twelve Days of Christmas, that's a nutcracker from the year we did all nutcrackers and that one is obviously a cat from the cat themed tree I did when I was 10."

The kids smiled, liking the story about Cassandra's dad that she continued to tell as she hung those ornaments on the tree, talking about the different themes they'd had.  The days they'd sit in his office with a piece of paper brainstorming.  She left out how her mother had often scoffed at them both and how it was a much needed escape for both of them.  But Jake read between the lines and trailed a hand across her back when she passed by him. Her returning smile was a little sad but grateful.

"Okay is that all the special ornaments?" Cassandra asked.

"Yeah, I think so." Jake said looking through the boxes.  "Aside from . .  . ."

"Mama's angel!" exclaimed Matt. "We need to put that up."

"But last." Maggie said, nodding.

"It's the topper," Jake said. "It's a Collins family heirloom."

Cassandra smiled. "Well, we'll make sure that goes up last then." She eyed the tree critically. "Another box or two of balls, I think. Jake do you want to pick the color?" She looked at the twins and back at him, her eyes widening and he laughed. The two adults had spent the entire day negotiating between the twins' varying opinions and they'd both had enough.

"Yeah, I think it's best if I pick.  I'm thinking red this year."

Soon the rest of the tree was decorated and the angel placed on top with all due ceremony.

Cassandra looked over the tree with delight. Her mother would have hated the mismatch of store bought, heirloom and homemade ornaments only loosely tied together with the red balls.  But they all told a story: Baird-Stone-Collins and now Cillian. And it was them. Their Christmas tree, their memories.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Jake said coming to put his arm around her waist as the kids circled the tree to look at it.

"You wanted to make our own memories.  But this tree? It combines your memories and mine.  And that's what makes it ours. And I love it."

Jake didn't say anything he just turned and pressed a kiss to her forehead and pulled her closer. And she leaned on his shoulder and they both went back to admiring their tree.


	11. Holiday Shopping

As was often the case with a couple with children and full time jobs, Cassandra and Jake didn't have much time to themselves.  Jake's mother had insisted the two of them still had date night and baby sat the kids one night a week, usually Thursdays.  But on those nights, the two of them had made a pact to make their date all about them, so they didn't talk about family or work,  just concentrated on them as a couple.

But every once in a while they did have family related things to talk about and they usually talked about them on their Wednesday lunch date of sorts. On rare occasions, Jake was actually able to get out of the city and take her to lunch on Wednesdays.  But most of the time, they just both took lunch at the same time and talked on the phone.  A rare art, he'd laughed, no one spoke on the phone any more.

"The kids want to get you a Christmas present and I'd rather not have them get you something cheesy from the school fair.  Is there something inexpensive you'd like that they can get you?"

Cassandra smiled. "I've always wanted a plant for work.  Especially now that I have the desk near the window."

"Perfect," Jake chuckled. "Maybe a cactus, I know how much you love the natives garden."

"Yes, or a fern. Reminds me of you."

"You're adorable, Cassandra Cillian."

"You're just saying that. Okay then since I'm sure the twins will ask me to help them get  you a present, what would you like? I know you have a fondness for leather bracelets and you always wear that necklace May gave you, but those leather cuffs are more in my price bracket than theirs."

"Actually I saw some beaded bracelets at the import store that I kinda liked.  My Monet coffee mug broke too.  And if you wanna be practical, I could always use those small legal pads. I'm always jotting notes down."

"Vivid imagination that you have and you give me that." Cassandra chuckled. "Well, I suppose it's harder when you're an adult."

"Yeah, if I want something, I just buy it."

* * *

Christmas was coming soon and Cassandra was puzzling over her Christmas shopping list. She and Jake had discussed Christmas in his family.  His family had always celebrated Christmas simply, taking time to emphasis family and love over presents.  They did exchange gifts but they didn't give lavishly.  The children each received one big and one small gift from Santa and books from Jake.  This year both twins were getting bikes.  Maggie was getting an Elsa doll and Matt was getting a set of Star Wars action figures. Knowing Jake's book worm children, the books were probably the best part of it. Their grandmother Stone always sent them pajamas and usually a toy (probably Star Wars for both of them this year, Jake had said).  Grandmother Collins usually sent them clothes. Ones that Jake made them wear for a picture and then usually promptly donated to Goodwill.  Eve and Flynn would get them some sort of educational item, last year it was a telescope.  Mary and Jake, both having families, only did a cookie exchange for presents.

She'd bought an expensive scarf for her mother and had already shipped it off. She planned on buying gifts for Ezekiel, Flynn, Eve, Jake, Jake's parents and for the twins.  Jake had asked her to keep the gifts for the twins small.  And she'd already decided on them.  Matt was getting a set of colored pencils.  Maggie was getting this glass light catcher she'd seen at the import store when they were buying Jake's bracelets. It was to be hung in the window and the child had been mesmerized by it.

Ezekiel was getting a cocktail shaker, he'd been in a James Bond kick lately.  Eve was getting earrings. Flynn was getting a book a day desk calendar.  She wasn't exactly sure what to buy Bill but she was treating Jeanette to a spa day with her.  She'd just have to ask Jake what his dad liked.

And then there was Jake.  She just kept coming back to the leather cuffs even though he had a few. But he did seem to be wanting a new one.  She'd thought about a necklace, but the one he wore was from Mabel and she just. . . . When she'd started dating Jake, she'd made a vow not to interfere with the relationship he still had with his first wife.  His wedding ring had been buried with May, her own rings being set aside for the twins when they were older.  Instead he wore a necklace she'd bought him when they were dating, though he'd replaced the chain a time or two.

Cassandra respected the necklace and wouldn't dream of replacing it.  Every now and then he wore a ring on his right hand.  He'd gone through a spurt of wearing one all fall but then took it off to do something and hadn't put it back on. Maybe a ring?  She knew where it was, so she could figure out the size.

A ring would be perfect.  She grinned.  Now she just had to figure out a gift for Jake's dad. And get things for stocking stuffers.

The family hadn't done stockings in the past but this was the new addition that Cassandra had asked for.  And Maggie and Matt had been excited about it.   She'd explained she wanted to do the stockings more traditional, fruit and a candy stick and then some inexpensive little goodies that they'd use like lip balm and mittens.

And so finally Jake had agreed, though she had a feeling it was more because of how excited she was about it.  He'd also agreed to fill a stocking for her if she took care of the twins as well as his. She grinned, she was looking forward to seeing what he'd come up with. 

She looked at her phone.  It was her day off and Jake's mom had promised to take the twins when they got back from school.  This left her plenty of time to hopefully complete her shopping before her weekly date with Jake.  That was, if she got a move on.

* * *

 

Jake had finished most of his Christmas shopping.  The kids, his parents, Eve and Flynn had all been bought for.  This weekend he was making the cookies to send to Mary since she was spending Christmas with her in-laws this year.  The only person left on the list was Cassandra.

Back in October, he'd seriously considered proposing on Christmas.  But he'd realized that maybe it was too early for that.  He and Cassandra would get married and they'd have their babies, but not yet. They'd only been together for six months.  They had time and recent events had made him realize that they still had a lot to learn about each other. Maybe her birthday or their first anniversary would be a better time for that particular gift.  But that left him without any real ideas.

So now he was in his least favorite place in the world, the mall, window shopping for a gift for his girlfriend.  So many things seemed impersonal, impractical or just something his quirky Cassandra just wouldn't like.  Maybe the mall wasn't the best place to go, she was more of a vintage kinda girl.

He'd resisted looking in jewelry store windows, but the one family owned shop in the sea of chains in the mall had an item in the window that made him stop.

A charm bracelet.  Cassandra only occasionally wore bracelets, she wasn't as into them as he was. But a charm bracelet did fit her personality.  And her theme this Christmas of creating memories.  Little charms that reminded them of their relationship, that he could build on over their years together.

It was perfect for her and a promise from him as well.  With a smile, he went into the store. 

A little while later, armed with the bracelet and a few starter charms as well as an inexpensive trinket that he couldn't resist for her stocking, Jake left the store. He checked his phone.  He had just enough time to hit up Target for the rest of her stocking gifts before he picked her up for their date.

And with more cheer than he'd had when he got to the mall, he headed back to his car, humming a Christmas carol.


	12. Party Time

It was the week before Christmas and Cassandra's library was having a holiday party.  It was at a nice venue in town and everyone was having a good time.  But as usual, the crowd had eventually gotten too much for Jake so he left Cassandra talking to her co-workers and headed outside for some fresh air.

He was sitting in the corner of the deck, an area normally set aside for smokers, although there were none there at the moment.  But the heater was working and it was quite comfortable to sit.  He was lost in his thoughts when he felt a bottle being pressed into his hand.  He looked up to see his sister grinning at him. He saluted her with the beer she'd handed him and she took a seat.

"Too much for you?"  Eve asked getting comfortable and taking a swig of her own beer.

"You know me, too much forced social engagement makes me antsy."

Eve chuckled.  "And yet you have to do all those high society soirees with the museum."

Jake grunted. "Don't remind me,  the holiday one is Saturday."

"Right, I'm watching the twins because you get to bring Cassandra with you for once."

Jake grinned. "That's the only thing that's making this one bearable is that I get to spend the evening with her."

Eve smiled softly, "I love how you light up whenever you talk about her. Cassandra is really good for you and I think you're good for her."

Jake nodded but took a swig of his beer instead of answering.

"What's wrong?" Eve asked. "Is everything okay with the two of you?"

He nodded again, taking another drink before answering. "It is.  It could be more okay, but we're working on it."

"What does that mean?"

Jake sighed but he'd been wanting to talk to his sister about this for a while now. And he'd been conflicted as of late that maybe he should be proposing at Christmas instead of waiting. He just wasn't sure.

"You remember the fight we had? When I had you get the kids?"

"Yeah, I remember. By the way, Flynn still thinks you and Cassandra got food poisoning.  I didn't need him freaking out that she was going to quit on him because you broke up."

Jake bit back a bark of laughter. That was so like his brother-in-law. It was going to be interesting when the day came that Cassandra left to raise their child.

"Well, I told you we were okay. Didn't even make it the whole night," Jake shook his head at himself. "By 1am I was beggin' her to come home."

"That's typical.  I . . .I don't want to pry. I know, I know, that's totally not me. But you said you were okay and I know how your temper is."

"It wasn't the fight itself, it was a dumb . . .she hadn't told her mother she was even seein' me. And she still hasn't."

 Eve looked a little shocked. Flynn had met her father three days after they started dating. And even Mabel took Jake to meet her awful mother within weeks of them becoming serious.

"Wow, that's  . . .well I could see why you'd be upset."

"She has her reasons. Her mama is abusive and money hungry. Still wants her back with her cheating scumbag of an ex just cuz he's got money." Jake cringed. "After she told me the whole story, I totally get why and support her. When she's ready, I'll be by her side."

"But there's other issues?" Eve asked.

"Yeah," Jake sighed. "She finds it difficult to trust and sometimes it's so hard for her to believe that . . ." Jake shook his head. "My poor Cassandra. It's so hard for her to believe that anyone loves her.  Her daddy adored her, but her mother?  Cassandra doesn't think she loves her.  And her fiancé sure as hell didn't and she loved him so much.  I just didn't realize just how much remindin' she needs."

"Mabel had some of those same issues."

"She did, but she didn't . . . Mabel had people in her life that she knew loved her. Cassandra didn't. And it's a big difference.  I know how to handle some of Cassandra's insecurities, but not all of them. I'm learnin'. I'll get there. She's worth it to me."

"And she has to learn to handle yours."

Jake's head snapped up, as he'd been studying the ground most of the time he'd been talking.

"Oh come on, baby brother.  Remember who you are talkin' to. I know you better than anyone in the world except maybe Mama.  You don't think you're good enough for her."

"Oh I know I'm not good enough for her, but I try anyway." Jake tried to turn it into a laugh but failed. "I do worry. Cassandra grew up with money and I know, I know she doesn't care about that. I mean she makes a librarian's salary."

"And she's not like Flynn where he inherited all that money from his parents," Eve added.

"She has a trust fund," Jake said. "She gets it when she marries.  She says it'll be about equal a year to her current salary.  She wants to use it when we start having kids so she can raise them. May wanted to do that, but we couldn't afford it."

"That is a gift."

"She was just a teenager when he died, but I think her daddy still knows her better than anyone. She was born to be a mother and he gave her a gift to be able to do it.  It's kinda humbling sometimes. She isn't Hope, she's not looking just for a baby, she wanted a true love to be her children's father." Jake took a deep breath, his face filled with wonder.  "And she's chosen me."

Eve's smile was soft. "You think you're not lucky in love, but oh my dear brother you are. One true love is rare. You've been given two."

Jacob's smile was wistful, his fingers playing with the pendant on the necklace May had given him so long ago. "I keep feeling like I made a mistake, Eve."

"With Cassandra? You've gotta be kiddin' me." And Eve's voice went Okie like it sometimes did when she was annoyed or baffled.

"No, not . . . ." He tilted his head back frustrated. "Back when she moved in, my plans were to propose at Christmas. But then I changed my mind after the fight. I realized we have so much we need to learn about each other. But now I'm second guessin' what I bought her."

"Well, Flynn and I eloped after weeks." Eve grinned. "But you and I are a little different. Marriage is forever with you. I mean I hope Flynn and I last forever, but your view of marriage is way stronger than mine. Plus you have the kids to think about. It's not a bad idea to wait a few more months.  Give you more chances to make sure you're on the same page with everything."

"Yeah, that's what I keep tellin' myself. But I do . . .I love her so much Eve.  And I want to marry her and give her that baby she wants."

"And you will but you both can wait a bit. I'm thinking she's probably not expecting that proposal yet. What did you get her instead?"

"A charm bracelet and they had this pretty little ring at the jeweler's. A love knot, kinda the grown up version of a promise ring."

"I think those are perfect. She'll love them."

Jake grinned. "Thanks  Eve. For everything."

"Hey, that's what big sisters are for.  Ready to head back in?"

He nodded. "Yeah, let's go."

* * *

 

Saturday evening and Jake was already dressed and waiting downstairs for Cassandra.  Matt was in the living room too, engrossed in a book.  Eve had arrived a few minutes before and she'd gone up to see if Cassandra needed any help.

A co-worker of Eve's wife did hair and makeup, so she'd been enlisted to help Cassandra get ready.  It was a gala, so that meant being dressed to the nines.  So Cassandra had rented a dress for the occasion, reasoning that it made more sense than buying one she'd probably never wear again.  Maggie had been fascinated with the whole process and had been up with Cassandra since the makeup artist arrived.

Alison, the makeup artist, finally came down, giving him a smile and told him that Cassandra was going to be right down.  He grabbed the envelope from the table that Cassandra had set aside with the payment and thanked the woman.  She winked at him and told him to have a good night. As he opened the door, he saw the limo out front and looked at his watch. Cassandra had found a good deal on Groupon, so they'd decided to live it up for the night. Besides, then neither had to worry about driving. He waved at the driver hoping they wouldn't hold him up for too long.

Maggie came bouncing down the stairs in front of Eve. "Oh, Daddy! Cassie looks just like a princess. A real live Princess! Like Princess Kate!"

"Prettier maybe even," Eve winked down at her niece.

"I feel like a princess," Cassandra's voice came from the top of the stairs. "This is so beautiful."

And the breath left Jacob's body and he had to put his hand against the wall to support himself.  She looked like a vision, an angel, the most incredible work of art he'd ever seen.

The dress was gold, sheer long sleeves covered in gold lace, an illusion neckline and a gold fitted bodice that then moved into a full skirt that looked like layers of tulle.  Cassandra lifted the skirt to get down the stairs revealing vintage looking gold heels with an ankle strap. Very her. Cassandra normally was a necklace girl but the neckline didn't leave room for one. As her ears had never been pierced (she occasionally wore clip-ons), the only jewelry she wore aside from the gold butterfly hair clip in her hair was a gold and sapphire cocktail ring on her right hand.  He'd seen Eve wearing it before, so he assumed it was a loan for the night.  Her hair had been curled more than normal, swept off to the side into a fancy side ponytail kept in place by the hair clip.

Cassandra was looking concerned now as he was just staring in silence at her.

"Jacob?"

"You look . . .wow, beyond beautiful."

She blushed prettily and he held out a hand to help her down the last step.  When she'd safely reached the floor, he repeated an action from Halloween, bowing over her hand and kissing it before offering his elbow. "Ready to go, m'lady? The limo is here."

"I am."

They said their goodbyes to Eve and the kids and soon they were whisked off to the party.

* * *

 

The gala was like so many other of the museum fundraisers,  the wealthy and the wannabes flitting through the room.  Jake generally kept his 'desperately not wanting to be there' disguised with a charming smile.  But tonight, having Cassandra nearby made things much easier to bear. There were a few of the gala regulars that he did enjoy seeing and they all seemed delighted in Cassandra as well.

And her presence at his side kept the middle aged 'hungry housewives' completely at bay.  He'd always been polite but firm with them, but it didn't really do much good. If he'd been a different sort of man, he could have had his pick for years.  But aside from that mistake with Kerry (and even there he'd made an attempt on their return to Dallas to try and make something out of nothing), it had never been his scene, even when he'd been mourning and desperately lonely.  But tonight the presence of a date kept them from doing more than greeting him.

His more favorite patrons were the elderly women. Some of them were still frisky in a playful sort of way and he never minded their advances because he knew they were all in good fun.  Others were more maternal and had worried about him for years, wanting to know how his children were doing and so forth.

Cassandra had gotten shanghaied by a couple of elderly men who loved to contribute to libraries and Jake, momentarily alone, was watching her with a soft dreamy expression on his face.  One of his favorite elderly patrons appeared by his side.  Mrs. Klause had been an Oklahoman girl who'd married a Dallas millionaire years ago, she'd been a childhood friend of his grandmother.

"You did good, Jacob." She patted his elbow. "That girl is a treasure.  I'd been so worried about you since dear Mabel died."

Jake smiled. "There were times, Mrs. Klause, that I worried about myself."

"How many times do I need to remind you to call me Gretchen?" She tsked.

"Gretchen," Jacob good naturedly rolled his eyes. "Yes, but you know my mama raised me with respect."

She grinned back at him. "And you are a treasure as well, Jacob Stone.  This girl, is she good to your children?"

Jake nodded. "Cassandra is very good to them. Respects their mama's memory, loves them like her own. And they love her too.  We're happy, Gretchen."

Gretchen nodded satisfied. "She looks the type. You deserve happiness, dear."

"So does Cassandra. Her life hasn't been an easy one either. She needs us like we need her."

Gretchen smiled. "Then go over there and ask your girl to dance.  A night like this is not to be wasted when you're young."

Jake would have protested that he wasn't exactly young any more, but he knew that would be a waste of breath.  So he walked over and rescued Cassandra from her own admirers and escorted her down to the dance floor.

* * *

 

The night was nearly over and Cassandra and Jake were strolling in one of the galleries.  It was quiet because it had been roped off for the evening, but Jake as an employee was allowed access. Cassandra's walk had slowed and she leaned a little on her boyfriend.

"Tired?" he asked her. "I can call the limo early."

"Only a little, these shoes hurt a bit.  They're very pretty but I guess not to practical."

"Well, you're used to running around all day in sneakers after little ones."

Cassandra giggled and Jake stopped and pulled her into a hug. 

"I had an amazing night, Jake.  I know you don't really like these things and I didn't growing up and being forced to go to them either.  But tonight was different.  I felt like . . . well like a princess. This beautiful dress and the man I love only having eyes for me. . . .It was special.  I hardly even remember the awkward socializing. Not after you whisked me off to the dance floor. You're probably gonna get in trouble for spending most of the night with me."

"Nah, the holiday gala is the one that we're allowed to bring a date to, so the director knows we're gonna be payin' them attention.  And I did my bit.  Besides one of my favorite donors encouraged me to go enjoy my date.  And they'll be hell if anything gets said to me if she finds out."

Cassandra laughed. "Was that the lady you were talking to before you kidnapped me?"

"Yes, Mrs. Klause, she was an old friend of my grandmother.  She approves of you and in a way I feel like it's my granny's approval as well."

Cassandra smiled and then put her hands on his shoulders, smoothing down the fabric. "Did I tell you how handsome you looked tonight?"

"No, you didn't actually," Jake smirked.

"Well you do.  I was the luckiest girl at the ball tonight."  She moved so her arms were around his neck, lacing her fingers together.

"And I was the luckiest guy at the ball. But right now," and he tightened his hands around her waist. "I can't wait to get you home and see how beautiful that dress looks like on my floor."

Cassandra giggled and he captured her lips with  his. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can see Cassandra's gala dress at https://www.renttherunway.com/shop/designers/marchesa_notte/dipped_in_gold_gown


	13. Not a Creature Was Stirring

It was three days before Christmas.   The kids were off of school and sleeping in. Jake was on vacation and in a great mood because he just found out he'd finally won the Christmas decorating contest. Cassandra was working in the afternoon, so it was a lazy morning.  Jake and Cassandra took their coffee back up to bed and were snuggled up talking.

Cassandra sighed, a thought that had been bothering her all season breaking through.  She tried to keep it from coming out as she laid her head on Jake's shoulder, but she couldn't.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"I know you have strong feelings on gifts for Christmas and you know I won't interfere with your parenting but I . . . ."

"Cassie . . . ."

"It's just . . ." Cassandra moved out of his arms so they could look at each other. "I want to shower them with gifts.  I never had . . . .I love you all so much and I don't know how to express that."

"Ah," and Jake who had been slightly annoyed suddenly understood. He reached out and caressed her cheek. "Your daddy spoiled you."

She nodded, looking a little sheepish. "My mother too.  Mother because giving me all of this stuff meant that we were keeping up with the neighbors.  Dad . . .well Dad adored me. I was his little Princess and he showered me with things. Mother it was expensive things I didn't like. Dad it was things I did. And they weren't even expensive a lot of the time.  Pink pencils and hair ribbons and candy canes and . . . . You know?"

"I do, sweetheart. And I know that you . . .your Christmases were different than mine.  My folks, we never really had much. But we always had love.  Mama and Daddy, they wisely emphasized family over gifts. And Mary and I do the same with our own kids. Cassie, look, we know you love us.  You shower us with your love every day.  I don't know if you realize that, but you do."

"I do?"

"You do. Just by being you.  I promise, you're a gift every day."

"Oh, Jake," Cassandra's voice was watery and she kissed him. "Thank you for that."

"We didn't really have time to plan this year and this month had a bit of a rocky start," Jake sighed. "But next year, okay? We'll do some more things together?  Memories over things."

Cassandra nodded. "I'd like that.  I do have a couple of traditions that I would like to share with the kids this year too."

He smiled, "then we'll do that.  I did want to ask you. . . ." He bit his lip. "I wanted to know if you'd come see Mabel with us on Christmas Eve. I wasn't sure if, you know, you'd be comfortable with that or not."

Cassandra nodded. "Of course I'm comfortable with it, if you and the children are." She took a deep breath. "I um, went to see her once."

Jake looked surprised but not angry. "You did? When?"

"The day before I moved in with you.  I asked Eve for directions. "

"Oh, that's where those flowers came from." Jake said.  "I went to see her that day too. Must have just missed you.  Her friends sometimes visit so I didn't really think that much of it."

"You're not mad?"

"Why should I be mad?  One of the reasons why I love you is that you respect my relationship with May. It totally makes sense that you might have wanted to talk to her yourself. I um, I've heard you talk to her sometimes in the living room. I guess we rub off on you."

Cassandra laughed softly. "It's odd but she lives in this house just like we do.  You and the twins probably can hear her, but I never knew her voice.  I just get feelings from her . . . . That day I was at the grave, I swear she put her hand on my shoulder to offer comfort.  Magic or wishful thinking or something we don't quite understand . . ." Cassandra shrugged. "It doesn't matter.  She likes me and that's all that matters to me."

Jake nodded. "She does. I know she'd rather be here but . . . . " He cleared his throat over his own tears. "But we're loved now and I think that means she can finally rest. And that probably makes her really happy."

Cassandra wiped her eyes. "Okay, none of this. It's Christmas and we should wake the kids up before breakfast turns into lunch."

He chuckled glad for the change in mood and kissed her on the forehead.  But as he went to wake up the twins, he sent a thank you to Mabel for everything.

* * *

 

It was Christmas Eve morning and they were at the cemetery.  Cassandra thought it was a credit to Jacob that his children treated this visit as a joyous one as opposed to a sad or scary one.  He'd taught them that their mother was in their hearts and this place was just one of the many places they could talk to her, the special one reserved for milestones and holidays.  They stopped before the gate to buy a poinsettia from a volunteer group.  The kindly older  lady explained that the decorations they were selling helped in two ways, the funds for a veteran's group and in the morning another group would come through and collect them to bring joy to a nursing home. 

"Go pick the prettiest one," Jake said to the twins as he got his wallet out.

"Mama always wore red in the pictures," Matt said to Maggie. "Let's get her a red one."

The woman's head looked up and met Jake's eyes.  "Their mother?"  Her voice soft and sorrowful.

He nodded, his own voice sorrowful and low. "She passed on when they were only toddlers."

"Take two of them. I'll make a donation for one of them for you."

"You don't have to . . . ."

But Cassandra put her hand on Jake's arm to quiet him. "Her name was Mabel Stone."  And she took a 20 out of her purse. "And add that to the donation too.  Merry Christmas."

She kissed him on the cheek and went to help the kids with the other plant.

The volunteer smiled at him. "She's a good stepmother."

And the momentary sorrow vanished. "She will be, we're not quite there yet, not been together very long.  Geez, sorry, you don't need to hear this."

The woman laughed. "Oh sugar, that's what I'm here for. All kinds of people telling me things. I've been widowed twice myself.  Once like you, very young, he was killed in action.  Didn't leave me with babies like you were though. But I still miss him even though I had an amazing forty years with my Ted. If that girl is anything like my Ted was, then you're in good hands."

"Daddy!" Maggie's voice broke through the silence that followed. "We found two."

"Alright, be right there." Jake paid for the one plant. "Thank you so much. And Merry Christmas."

Cassandra had to admit she was a little nervous, she was glad she was carrying a plant, it gave her something to occupy herself with.  She hadn't been completely prepared to have the children excitedly introduce her to their mother, as if they were introducing her to a neighbor.  The children sat filling their mother in on what had recently happened and their Christmas plans and how school was going.  Jake held tight to Cassandra's hand and the two of them only added to the conversation when the twins addressed them.  When the twins had seemed to run out of things to say, Jake met Cassandra's eyes. She smiled softly and dropped his hand.

"Why don't we let your daddy talk to your mama alone for a bit? Let's head back toward the car.  And let's stop and thank the nice lady for giving in your mama's name, okay?"

The kids nodded and then Cassandra said she wanted to say goodbye to May.  That surprised Jake but he started the kids down the trail.

"Hey May," Cassandra said, kneeling briefly. "I'm doing my best with them, I really am.  I might be messing up a little bit, this parenting thing is hard.  I think I misstepped a little. I kinda wanna spoil them, just a little, you know?  But I love them so much and I just . . . . Well I'm trying.  But anyway, May, I hope it's as beautiful and peaceful where you are as Jacob and the children think it is. And thank you, always thank you."

She kissed her gloved fingers and touched the stone.  Then she joined Jake at the end of the trail and squeezed his hand before leading the kids back to the front.

When Jake found them twenty minutes later, Cassandra had taken the twins to the grassy area on the other side of the parking lot.  That way they could run around without danger of cars or disturbing anyone else.

Jake was quiet and his eyes were a little red, but he pulled Cassandra into a tight hug .

"You okay?" She asked softly.

"I am now."  He released her and then called to Matt and Maggie. "Hey, we ready for hot chocolate now?"

"Yes!" Maggie cried rushing over.

"Cookies too?" Matt asked.

Jake laughed and Cassandra figured it was a much needed one. "Only one, but yes, I could go for a cookie myself."

They stopped at a bakery cafe for cookies and hot chocolate even though it was close to lunch. Jake had winked at Cassandra and said he lifted the rules for the holiday.   They'd had a big breakfast after all and were having an early dinner.

Eve was hosting the family dinner tomorrow.  So tonight's dinner was fairly casual. The kids were too excited to really eat much at that point, even though they weren't opening presents until the morning. It was the anticipation of the holiday.  Plus they were going to the early family service at church.

Cassandra joined them for church, although she didn't usually go with them on Sundays.   Cassandra respected Jake's beliefs and vice versa.  She'd been nervous the first Sunday she'd decided to join them but found his church to be very friendly.  And none of them ever questioned her sporadic attendance.  That made her comfortable enough to attend this night and she had to admit it was a beautiful and joyous service.

She particularly appreciated the calming effect night time church had on the children as they were finally done bouncing up and down when they got through.

Cassandra had gifted everyone with Christmas pajamas, although the best she could coax her boyfriend into were red plaid sleep pants and a plain green teeshirt. But the kids had Christmas Pajamas: Matt with Mickey and Maggie with Minnie.  Cassandra herself had a classic pajama set with cats dressed in Santa hats over a pink background.

They snuggled down and watched _A Charlie Brown Christmas_ and _How the Grinch Stole Christmas_ and then she'd asked Jake to read _A Visit from St. Nicholas_.

By this point, the twins were about ready for bed.  Cassandra told them to go make up the plate of cookies for Santa and she had one more tradition for them.

Jake helped them by getting out the Santa plate and cup set that Mabel had bought for them on their first Christmas.  He'd laughed at her at the time, pointing out their babies were too little for Santa. But they used it every year.  And he sighed knowing that it wouldn't be too much longer before these two would lose their innocence.  But as he looked at Cassandra holding a snowflake in the other room, he figured there would be at least one more child using this set on Christmas for years to come.

"What's that?" Matt asked Cassandra as he and Maggie returned. Maggie carefully placing the milk and cookies on the end table in the den.

"It's a Santa beacon." Cassandra smiled. "We put it in the window so that Santa can find us."

"Oooh!" Matt exclaimed.  "Can I put it in the window?"

"You sure can."

Cassandra watched to make sure the suction cup worked properly and then helped Matt turn it on to the delight of both children.

Then Jake was sending them off to bed.

While he was upstairs, Cassandra got a text and was soon opening the door to a smiling Flynn who'd been hiding the kids' bikes at his place.

"Ho Ho Ho!"

Cassandra giggled but shushed him. "We just got them up to bed. They were pretty wiped and I'm sure Jake is reading them one more story to cover the noise, but . . . ."

"Nope, wouldn't want to spoil it.  Now you'll get sick coming out in your jammies, so just hold the door open for me. I've got them."

When Jake came downstairs with the other wrapped presents,  Flynn was eating the Santa cookies, the bikes in their place of honor.

Jake raised his eyebrows.

"She said since I played Santa I could eat them. There's more in the kitchen in you want one."

Jake chuckled. "I just might.  Egg nog for the road?"

"Well . . . better leave the rum out of mine until tomorrow. But sure.  Oh and the bike helmets are from Eve and I, but you can tell them they're from Santa since he forgot that little fact."

Jake laughed, heading to the kitchen. "I totally did, so thanks for that call."

Flynn followed, "never wore them when we were kids."

"Yeah, exactly.   Where is Cassie?"

"She's in the living room filling the stockings, she told me not to let you come in."

"Oh right, I have to go do that for her too."

Cassandra returned about fifteen minutes later.  The boys had eaten quite a few cookies and had some egg nog.

"Well, I better get going. Merry Christmas and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Thanks for helping Flynn."

"Hey, anything for those two. You know that."

"Yes, and tell my sister Happy Birthday from me again."  Jake had taken his sister out to lunch the day before given the holiday, but had called her during the day anyway.

"While there's some time left.  Night guys."

"Night Flynn."

Cassandra kissed Jake. "I think I'm going to bed. I have a feeling those kids are gonna be up early."

"They are.  I just have to put your gifts out and I'll be up."

"No peeking in your stocking!"

"I won't.  Love you."

"Love you too."

And when he finished putting her gifts in her stocking and making sure the house was locked up, he came upstairs to find her fast asleep.  He smiled and curled himself around her and was asleep within moments himself.


	14. And To All A Good Night

Cassandra was woken earlier than she'd like on a day off by the bed moving.  Somehow, during the night, she'd ended up in her usual place sprawled across Jake's chest and she could hear his chest moving before she finally heard him laughing.  She lifted her head blinking and two excited children were practically bouncing on the bed.

As tired as she was, she couldn't help but smile. These two children were as excited by their usual two gifts from Santa as she'd ever been about her dozens.  And now she realized it was about the traditions and the joy than the gifts themselves.

But it was so early. She looked over at the clock, 7am.  Jake chuckled, noticing her look.

"That's a whole hour later than last year!  Maybe next year, we'll get to 8."

"C'mon, we wanna see what Santa brought!" Matt said impatiently.

Maggie was just as impatient as her brother but she did remember to say Merry Christmas.

"Okay, okay, but let your M--"And Jake stopped himself blinking, wow he was really tired.

"Let the adults get some coffee into them first." Cassandra finished for him. "Why don't you two go get your slippers on, okay?  And then at least have juice while we have coffee. We'll be right there."

As soon as the kids scooted off, Jake was looking at her a little sheepish.

"You almost called me their mother?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry.  Wow, I am not awake."

Cassandra smiled softly, "well in a few years, we'll have someone calling me mama. But the twins . . . Well, they have a mama.  But if they ever wanted to call me mom or something, I wouldn't object. But I'm leaving that up to them. I can be Cassie to them for the rest of their lives if they wish."

Jake grinned but knew Cassandra didn't really expect a response. Instead, he kissed her forehead and then sighed. "We better get down there before they start shouting at us. I need coffee badly."

"Good thing I set the coffee maker for 6:30 last night then," Cassandra chuckled bouncing out of bed. "I was hoping so much for later but . . . ."

"Good call."

* * *

Soon, armed with coffee, the family went into the den.   Matt and Maggie shrieked with delight when they saw their bikes.  And if it hadn't been a rainy morning, they probably would have dropped all other thoughts of toys and went out riding them.    But Maggie was excited by her doll nonetheless and Matt his action figures.  Jake was glad that he knew his mother had bought them more because while Maggie loved her doll, she really seemed to want Star Wars toys too.  Luckily Matt had gotten two in his set, so he promised to let her play one and even suggested that Elsa could play too.

"That's adorable," Cassandra said to Jake on the sofa.

Eve was hosting dinner this year so the gifts from her and from their grandparents would be exchanged then.  Which left the remaining gifts those from Cassandra, himself and the twins.

"How about we open the stockings first, then we'll open the gifts?"  Cassandra asked.

Maggie said, "oh I got Sparky a gift too! Daddy?"

"Right," Jake said getting up and going into his desk where he pulled out a little clear plastic stocking filled with cat toys.

As if being summoned, Sparky strolled into the room, looking a little spooked by the bikes.  But Maggie distracted him with one of the balls from the gift and soon he was chasing the ball into the living room ahead of them.

The twins had very similar things in their stockings: a clementine, two old fashioned candy sticks, a candy cane, lip balm in their favorite flavors and mittens. Knowing that they'd be particularly excited about  Star Wars this Christmas,  Cassandra also got them themed pencils, bookmarks and a coloring book each.

The twins thanked her and gave her big hugs and then were excited about what was in the adults' stockings.

Cassandra asked Jake to go first.  He had a candy cane and a chocolate orange, an adult coloring book with a pack of colored pencils and he had to laugh when he pulled out a pack of mini legal pads.

"You said you needed them!" Cassandra said.

Rounding out his stocking was the soundtrack from the new Star Wars movie.

"Okay, your turn, Cassie." Matt said, having been unsuccessful in his bid to trade his own orange for his father's chocolate.

Cassandra had chocolates, some of her favorite strawberry hard candies, bubble bath, Dr. Pepper lip balm (she'd told Jake once that it had been her favorite as a kid and she giggled when she saw it), warm fuzzy socks with cats on them and a cute little cat pin.  Jake looked concerned though when she seemed to be finished.

"There's something else in there." He said.

"Okay, I thought . . ."  But Cassandra fished around in the stocking and her fingers hit something cold in the toe of the stocking.  Her eyes went wide for a moment, she hadn't been expecting a proposal now, not at all, could it be?   But then as she grasped the object she realized while it was a ring, it didn't have a stone on it.

It was a pretty little ring, silver with a knot on it.  She almost laughed realizing that she'd had a similar idea with the gift for her boyfriend.  She smiled over at him. "It's so pretty , Jake."

The twins had gotten distracted looking over at their own gifts, having decided that Jake and Cassandra's were a little boring.  So Jake crossed over to her and took the ring out of her hand. "It's a lover's knot.  It's a promise to you from me and them.  You have our hearts and they're bound with yours."

Cassandra bit back her tears as he slipped it on her left ring finger and then threw her arms around his neck. "I love you."

"I love you, too. Merry Christmas darlin'."

Matt sighed behind them before they'd gotten very far in the kiss that followed. "Can we open the other gifts?"

The kids liked their gifts from Cassandra and were excited by the books from their father.  The twins had bought Cassie a cactus that Matt informed her they'd named Fred.  And Jake had already put on the bracelets the kids had bought him.

Then Cassandra handed him a small box from under the tree.  She was a little nervous at the confused look on his face, but he opened it without saying anything.

Then he grinned when he saw the silver ring with the Celtic design.  "Similar thoughts, sweetheart?"

She nodded. "It's not a lover's knot precisely, that's a different design. But I thought you'd like this one better. It's a trinity knot.  These days it symbolizes the Holy Trinity, but it had an even older meaning.  Anyway, I kinda think it fits us too, you, me, the children, a never ending knot.  And I'm Irish, so I thought it was the perfect fit."

"I love it." Jake said, pausing to kiss her before putting it on his right hand.  He had a feeling she'd sized it based on the ring he'd left on his nightstand and he wore a different size on the other hand.

"Alright, that just leaves your gift and then we can have some breakfast."

"Breakfast!" Matt cried from the sofa. "I'm starvin'!"

"Just a minute, geesh, you barely let us have coffee."  His father rolled his eyes then handed Cassandra a long flat box.

The charm bracelet had four starter charms: a book, a cat, a castle and small disc that was stamped with 'I believe in you.'  There was also a gift card inside the box.

"It was the gift with purchase, it should cover the price of one charm if you'd like to pick one out of your own."

Cassandra beamed. "Oh it's beautiful. I've seen them before and thought they were so lovely."

Jake smiled and brushed a lock of hair off her cheek. "I thought it would be a good start on our life together.  We can add to it as the years pass by. A birthstone maybe in a couple of years, for example."

Cassandra blushed but just thanked him and then got up saying, "Alright, time to eat!"

* * *

"It's the happy elf!" Flynn had exclaimed when he opened his door later that day.  Cassandra had gone all out for the holidays in a red dress over a red petticoat and green and white elf striped leggings, a gold bow necklace and a matching one in her hair.  She had added  Jake's charm bracelet on her wrist and his ring on her finger.  Even Matt who tended not to notice clothes had been delighted by Cassandra's outfit and asked if they could all dress up next year, like Halloween.

"Maybe not quite that much," had been his father's answer.

Everyone was in good cheer and Jake had been glad he had that long talk with his dad at Thanksgiving.  That lingering tension that had always been there on the family occasions (despite Bill's love for his grandchildren and both of their attempts to push it aside for the holiday) was completely absent.  Which made everyone else seem even happier.  Cassandra also had managed to only endure a five minute phone call with her mother this morning as her mother  was visiting relatives in Florida and the line wasn't free. She knew that soon she was going to have to face her mother, but for now, what she wanted to concentrate on was her new family.

Dinner had been delicious and presents had been exchanged.  Now it was time for their traditional movie marathon.  Cassandra had found out that the Stones tended to watch well loved classics because the kids would play and the adults would talk and it was easier.  They were going to start with The Wizard of Oz and then White Christmas and maybe Singin' in the Rain if anyone was still interested after that.

Halfway through The Wizard of Oz, Cassandra headed to the kitchen for coffee.  Eve walked in as Cassandra covered her mouth trying to hide a yawn.

Eve chuckled as she watched Cassandra pour a cup.  "When did they get you up this morning?"

"7," Cassandra groaned.

"Well that's an hour later than last year."

"That's what Jake said. I don't know how I should take that.  But they were so excited.  Despite . . . ." Cassandra shook her head at herself.  She'd made her peace with Jake's parenting style, knowing that their kids too would have the same Christmas traditions.

"Only 2 gifts?" Eve said knowingly. "We were always so excited over them ourselves. I didn't even know other kids got anything different until I was probably 10.  Poor little Jakey . . .when he was 7 he came home crying from school after break.  Someone had told him that Santa hadn't gotten him much because we were poor."

"Kids can be mean," Cassandra said softly.

"And Jake was a sensitive soul," Eve sighed. "Which is why he was so different as a teen. I wish I'd protected him better, you know?  He had to fight his own battles and so he decided to be a jock and pretend he wasn't who he really was. If it hadn't been for Mabel . .  . ."

Cassandra nodded.  Jake had eventually told her the whole story of his teen years and how he'd only embraced who he was because of first his attempts to impress May and then later because of his love for her.

"Anyway, after that happened, our parents sat us down and told us about Christmas and why we celebrated it the way we did. I mean Mary had already stopped believing by then and I was on the verge myself. But both of us kept the secret for our little brother's sake.  And it was so beautiful what they said . . . .Well, Mary and Jake raise their own kids that way. "

"I know.  And it is beautiful, your family and your traditions and all the love.  It's just my family wasn't at all like that." Cassandra bit her lip. "Though I have to admit, I'd rather have my children bouncing on my bed at 7am excited over one gift and all the love that came with it, then to have them experience even a moment of my childhood, even with all of the presents."

"I'm sorry, Cassandra." Eve said softly. "Even when Dad and Jake weren't seeing eye to eye . . .well what we Stones have a lot of is love.  Jake told me once that your mother isn't exactly um . . . ."

"Mother of the year?"

Eve nodded.

"All I can do is rise above it.  And your brother . . .well you and he and your family, you give me an example to follow with the little ones that will come into my life. And all I can do is my best."

"All any of us can do." Eve looked over at her and decided that a change in subject was due. "Can I see your bracelet? Jake told me he bought you one, but not what charms he got."

Cassandra nodded eagerly and held out her wrist. "Isn't it darling? I love the castle. And I have a card to pick out a charm of my choice too.  And," Cassandra chuckled. "We both basically got each other promise rings."

"I knew he got you one and I saw his too.  You weren't expecting a proposal?"

Cassandra shook her head. "No, not yet. It's way too early. And we had a rocky patch recently too. We have stuff to figure out still. But we will.  There's no rush. When we get married, it'll be for keeps and I want us to be completely on the same page."

"I thought you'd say that."  Eve started to say something else but Flynn poked his head in the kitchen.

"Are you coming back? We miss you."

Both women laughed and  joined the men in the living room.

* * *

That night, Cassandra and Jake tucked two exhausted children into bed, both of them falling asleep almost as soon as their heads hit the pillows.

"You know," Cassandra said, her voice apologetic. "I had an idea tonight that involved this red lingerie and mistletoe, but honey, I'm exhausted. I'm sorry."

Jake laughed and put his arms around her. "How about I take a rain check on that lingerie? Mama has the kids for New Year's Eve and I have you allll night to myself.  As for the mistletoe, where is it?"

Cassandra pointed to the ceiling above the bed, so Jake steered them toward it, both of them landing on the bed in a fit of giggles. They kissed briefly and then snuggled up together.

"We're still in our regular clothes," Cassandra said.

"Yeah, but I'm too comfortable to move right now.  Let's just enjoy the peace and quiet for a while."

Cassandra laughed. "I do love your Christmases, but yes, peace and quiet, blessed peace and quiet."

"Merry Christmas, Cassandra."

"Merry Christmas, Jake."

And if they fell asleep fully clothed, curled up in the middle of the bed, well that's what happens when twins wake up at seven in the morning.


	15. New Year's Eve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jake and Cassandra celebrate New Year's with a little one on one time . . . .

It was New Year's Eve.  Jake had to work part of the day as the museum was open, though closing early.  The library was closed but Cassandra was putting on a program for the local park district.  The parks district employed her and a local kindergarten teacher to put on a few programs a year, one of which was the Noon Year's Eve party.  The twins usually spent the day with their grandmother or Eve before having an early celebration with their father (last year he let them stay up until 9 but they'd barely made it past 8). 

This year, Jake's mother had insisted that he and Cassandra have their own celebration and was taking them in the evening.  So instead, the kids were coming with Cassandra to the Noon Year's Eve event and then they'd have dinner when Jake came home before going to their granny's.

Maggie had insisted on wearing her party dress, though Cassandra had noted with dismay that it was almost too short now. It still worked but probably would need to be replaced before the next event she needed it for. The twins getting bigger always seemed to unsettle Jake, but Cassandra supposed she'd feel that way too in due time.  Maggie had sequined flats that matched Cassandra's. They'd spent a fun afternoon during Christmas break gluing sequins to a couple of pairs of old shoes to transform them for the occasion.

Cassandra was wearing a silver sequined sweater and a skirt with a pattern of moons and stars on it.  It had turned chilly so she'd worn navy leggings under her skirt and had Maggie wear leggings too.

The turnout was quite good, Cassandra recognizing most of the children either from the library or from the summer play dates at Jake's house.  She told a couple of stories, there was a craft and then a dance party. 

At noon they had a countdown, complete with noise makers, confetti and streamers.  The twins hugged Cassandra excitedly at "Happy New Year" before blowing their noise makers.

Jake and Cassandra's neighbor Jessica offered to take the twins with her kids for lunch while Cassandra and the rest of the staff cleaned up the party.  That took a load off Cassandra's mind as she actually hadn't thought about child care while she cleaned up.  Because Jessica would drop the kids off at home, that left Cassandra with a few spare minutes for a last minute shopping trip for her evening plans.

When Jake got home, the children excitedly told him all about their day and how much fun they had. Cassandra had let Maggie wear her party dress after the event, figuring it was a special day.  After the twins had finally let their father go to say hello to Cassandra in the kitchen, he pressed a kiss against her cheek before sighing.

"The dress?" Cassandra asked knowingly. "That's why I just let her wear it, that's gonna be the last time she'll fit into it."

Jake shook his head. "We bought that before her birthday.  I guess I should be happy it lasted this long.  They were just babies a little while ago and now they're nearly seven."

"Hey, now, none of that. This is a happy day."

"Right, right, it's just sometimes time passing . . . ." Jake shook his head. "Never mind. How are you?  Kids not wear you out too much?"

"Not too much." Cassandra winked at him.

Matt and Maggie chose that moment to come into the kitchen so the flirty remark that Jake had prepared to make was lost.

After dinner, Jake sent the kids to make sure they had everything they wanted to take to their grandmother's.

"Did you want to come with us?" he asked Cassandra as he helped her clean up the kitchen.

"No, I have a few things I want to do here." She smirked at him. "Don't stay too long at your mama's, okay?"

Jake sucked in a deep breath. "Oh, I won't."

* * *

 

Jake returned about an hour later, which was about 20 minutes later than he'd planned on. But a combination of traffic and talking to his mother had delayed him. 

"Sweetheart?" he called, coming into a dimly light house.  The downstairs lights were either off or on their dimmer settings.  The only full light was the one over the stairs.  Figuring Cassandra was upstairs, he hung up his coat and headed for the stairs. 

That's when he saw the trail of rose petals leading up the stairs, the effect marred in a couple of places where Sparky had obviously had a bit of fun.  He chuckled, it was still romantic.

The trail of petals lead to their bedroom door, which had been closed.  He could hear soft music coming from inside and he gently opened the door.

The trail of petals lead to the bed.  The room was lit only by candle light and by the new electric fireplace they'd purchased right after Christmas.  He didn't see Cassandra and was about to call for her when the bathroom door opened.

The bathroom was also lit by candles and she lingered in the doorway, enjoying his eyes on her.  She was wearing a red corset trimmed in gold and matching panties. The lingerie she'd bought for Christmas but didn't have a chance to use. 

When Jake managed to close his opened mouth and stop staring, he quirked a finger at her to get her to come closer to him.

"I wanna see you better."

She giggled and walked closer to the fire where there was more light.  There he could see that the corset was just as gorgeous as it was sexy, beautifully embroidered.  Her red hair in the candle and firelight made her look like a goddess and he knew he was less than worthy.

"You look . . ." Jake just stared at her. "I can't . . .wow. . .I'm speechless. You look beyond amazing."

"Thank you," Cassandra said gently, putting her arms around his neck. "Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year indeed."  Then he put his hands at her waist, pulling her into him for a kiss.

The kiss quickly grew heated, but suddenly, Jake was backing them out of it.

"What's wrong?" Cassandra asked, her face looking worried.

"Nothing, nothing at all."  He paused to give her a gentle kiss. "Just slowin' it down.  We've got all night.  And it's gonna take all night for me to do everything I want to do to you."

"Oh really?" Cassandra lifted an eyebrow but then purred, "and what exactly do you want to do to me, cowboy?"

Jake gaped at her.  He wasn't used to this side of Cassandra but he liked it.  But she took his silence for disapproval and he could see her confidence begin to falter.

"I just . . .Jake. . . ."

"No, no, darlin', hey," he gently cupped her face in his palm. "You caught me off guard, that's all. That purring thing . . .oh wow, hot.  And um, feel free to call me cowboy again cuz I did not know I liked that but from you?  So so hot."

Her smile started a little shy but she whispered, "cowboy."

Then he kissed her until they were both short of breath.

She panted in his ear, "you were going to tell me what you wanted to do to me."

He didn't answer at first, just kissed his way up her neck to her ear.  He nipped her ear lobe and then whispered in her ear.  To her credit, she managed not to blush too much.  And she noticed as he pulled away from her ear though that he'd not managed to get through without blushing himself.

"So," he asked as she started undoing buttons on his shirt, "where did you want to start?"

She didn't answer, just continued unbuttoning.  When she finally got to the bottom button, she kissed her way from his stomach to his chest, pushing the shirt off when she got to his neck.  Jake, with a growl, pulled her into a kiss and backed her toward the bed. But even then she got the upper hand, moving so that he ended up landing on the bed on his back.

"You asked me, Red," Jake said as she straddled him. "But you seem to have all the ideas."

Cassandra bit her lip, suddenly shy.  Jake pushed up into a seated position on hand on her hip, the other moving up to caress her cheek.

"Sweetheart, stop it. I told you, I really like this side of you.  Relax okay? We have all night.  Let yourself do what feels good."

She nodded and moved his hand from her cheek to the tie in the front of her corset, encouraging him to undo it.  Once it was loosened, he slid his hand in to caress her briefly before stopping on her look.  She was in charge.

She leaned forward to kiss him and then softly asked, "so can I?"

"Be in charge? Oh hell yes."

"Alright . . ." she said softly.  Then a wicked grin spread across her face. "Call me Red again."

He smirked back at her. "Red."

She chuckled. "Just remember, you asked for this, cowboy."

Then she pushed him backwards on the bed.

* * *

 

Sometime later, they emerged from the bedroom briefly to grab champagne and the assortment of snacks Cassandra had prepared earlier.

Cassandra giggled as she sipped at her champagne. "I feel positively decadent.  Lying here eating in bed."

"Naked," Jake added, his eyes raking over her.

"Naked," she agreed with an impish smile.

She picked up an orange slice from the platter and offered it to him.  He ate it out of her fingers, sucking her fingertips into his mouth briefly.  After he swallowed, he kissed her, slightly sticky and orange flavored.  He returned the favor, dipping a strawberry in his glass of champagne before holding it up to her lips.

This continued for a while, feeding each other pieces of fruit followed by sweet sticky kisses that increased in passion with each piece of fruit.

Cassandra giggled as Jake took the last strawberry and placed it in his mouth and moved forward to share it with her.  In the enthusiasm of the kiss that followed, some of the champagne in the glass she'd been holding splashed out onto her breasts.

Cassandra gasped, not expecting it.

"Are you okay?"

"It's just . . .everything is sticky now."  She looked over on the nightstand but remembered she'd moved the tissue box to make room for candles.  "Plus it's cold."

"I've got an idea," Jake said with a wink.  He moved the platter from the bed to his nightstand and removed the flute from her hands.

"Okay . . . ." Cassandra said, noticing he hadn't gotten up to get her a washcloth or tissues.

Jake moved forward, starting to kiss her neck, then his mouth moved lower, licking her skin clean.

She sighed, this time in pleasure. After a few moments, she murmured, "Jake?"

"What?" his reply was muffled.

"This is a very good idea."

"I'm glad you approve."  His hand reached over to the nightstand and Cassandra giggled as another drizzle of champagne hit her chest.  When that had been licked clean, Cassandra grabbed the flute.

"I have similar ideas."

"Did I ever tell you that you are brilliant?"

"Yes," Cassandra moved in closer. "But you can tell me again any time you like.  Better yet, show me."

Jake's delighted laugh was cut off by Cassandra's kiss.

* * *

 

Midnight and they rang in the new year with a kiss.  This kiss was tender and loving, even a little lazy, they were both a little tired from the festivities of the evening.  Not long before, they'd both taken a quick shower and changed into pajamas, it being a little too chilly to stay naked all night.

Jake got up to shut off the fireplace and blow out the candles on the dresser.  Cassandra clicked on one of the lamps and blew out the candles on the nightstand, they had already blown out the ones in the bathroom.

Jake came back into bed and pulled Cassandra into his arms.

"Ready to sleep?" he asked her, kissing the side of her head.

"Not quite yet,  but this is really nice.  Tonight was amazing."  She smiled. "Every once in a while, I like having you completely to myself."

Jake was a quiet for a long moment and Cassandra turned in his arms to look at him. "Honey?"

"It's . . .nothing really. I just sometimes feel like I'm cheating you a little. You deserve to have my full attention and I just can't most of the time."

"Jake . . . ."

"I know what you're gonna say, Cassie. You knew about the kids going into this.  And May. And work and everything else.  I just . . .I adore you, you know? And you deserve everything."

"It's okay, Jake.  It's not like I don't have things too.  And the kids.  Eventually  we'll have more kids. That's how life is. And I know most couples get some time before the kids, but it is what it is.  You just give me a night like this every once in a while . . ." She grinned. "We don't even need to spend it this way either.  Just a night where I'm your sole focus and you're mine. That's all I ask.  Just every once and a while."

His smile was tender. "You got it.  I love you, Cassandra."

"I love you too."

They fell silent after that, just holding each other, an occasional kiss or caress.  Cassandra was actually sure Jake had fallen asleep when his voice broke into the silence.

"Cassie?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you upset that I didn't propose?"

"Whoa, where did that come from?"  she asked, pushing herself into a seated position. He did the same facing her.

"I've been thinkin' about it off and on since Christmas.  You had a strange look on your face when you pulled that ring out of your stocking.  I was . . .I thought about it, about proposin', but I didn't think we were there yet."

"We're not," Cassandra shook her head. "I was startled when I felt that ring because I didn't think we were there quite yet.  But I would have said yes.  You know that, I want to marry you."

"And I want to marry you.  It's just . . . ."

"Marriage is for keeps.  We found out there's lots of stuff we still have to learn about each other. There's no hurry, sweetheart, we do have time. I know . .  . ."

Jake sighed. "I didn't have that time with May.  But that was just a twist of fate. I know in my heart that we do have time, I just . . .I get scared sometimes. Scared that I'll lose you like I did her and I . . . . It sounds so stupid, I know."

"No, no it doesn't! Don't think that."  Cassandra moved closer to him to put her arms around him. "I can't relate with what you went through, but I imagine that having that fear is normal.  It doesn't consume you or make you paranoid, that would be cause for worry. But you're like me and you have some self doubt already, so . . . .  But we do have time, honestly, we do Jake.  We probably have moved too fast already.  Let's just get this right, okay?  I'm not going anywhere."

"I ain't going anywhere either.  You're right.  I want to make sure it's right.  I've just been worried over nothing." Jake chuckled. "See, we're doing it again. We're on the same page but I've been worried we weren't."

Cassandra laughed too. "See, this is why we need to talk about it.  And this is a step in the right direction as far as this goes, okay?  Now we know we're in agreement, about waiting a little while to get engaged."

"And about making sure we spend some one on one time now and then too. Not just our date nights, but this too.  Although maybe not making love all night long, lordy woman, you're gonna wear me out!"

Cassandra giggled. "You loved it."

He dropped a kiss on her nose. "I did. But seriously. . ."

"Yeah and you had to work today, so sleep sounds good.  What time are we picking up the kids?"

"Not until late morning, so wanna go out for breakfast?"

"Perfect."

He kissed her once more. "You know last year was pretty damn good. I think this year will be even better."

"Yes, it will be.  Happy new year, cowboy."

"Happy new year, Red."

Cassandra turned off the light and they snuggled together as usual.  Drifting off into sweet dreams about a new year and an even brighter future.

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading along! I never thought so many people would like this verse when I started it. Look for another story in the series soon. Comments are so appreciated. And thank you again so very much.


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